Kill Bill Vol.1 (2003)

Whitey: It’s been four years of Born to Watch, so happy birthday to us.

From humble beginnings, we've grown to be a movie podcast superpower for dozens of you.

And what better way to celebrate our birthday than with a Quentin Tarantino double shot? Tonight it's the samurai fever dream that's Kill Bill: Vol 1, which could be Tarantino's most fun and most rewatchable movie. [00:02:00] Uma Thurman's back and wreaking havoc on the deadly Viper Assassination Squad. That's a hard word to say, assassination.

Will: It is.

Whitey: After being left for dead on her wedding day. We've got Dan back from another sabbatical. How are you, mate?

Absolutely did that on purpose. I absolutely did that on purpose.

Will: Shit.

You all right, Dan, or what's-

Dan: I was chewing on my bogie bowl, minding my own business, thinking what else I could've been doing for four years, and then you threw to me. So yes, good to be back. Good to be on with Will The Worky. Definitely my favored member of the team over Phantom Pants, uh, the, The Tent Slayer, and that angry cunt from Suffolk Street in Killroy, Sloane.

Okay. So [00:03:00] yes, well done.

Whitey: Well, you've beaten us to the punch, and joining us, in what could be life imitating art, is Will The Worky. How are you?

Will: I'm good, Matt, how are you?

Whitey: Very good. And we've spoken at length previously about your dad and his penchant-

Will: Yes ...

Whitey: for samurai swords- Yes ... and all things martial arts.

Will: Yeah. So

Whitey: this must've been a nice watch.

Will: It was great. Yeah. It was great. My dad also did own a samurai sword. Of

Whitey: course he did. Was it a Hattori Hanzo?

Will: Oh, he wishes, man. Tell you what, he wishes. I do know that he took a couple of swings at a baseball, but he hasn't hit one. I tell you that.

Whitey: He's got many bruises.

Many

Will: bruises. Yeah, absolutely.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Mate, now look, it's not only is it our fourth birthday, but it's something that could be even more incredible, and it's Will's Grecoversary. 18 episodes on Born To Watch. Oh, what an

Will: honor. What

Whitey: an

Will: honor.

Whitey: And, and pretty [00:04:00] evenly spread, although you've been a bit of a go-to over the last six months.

Will: Yeah, a little bit. Yeah. I don't know how many I've done in the last six months, but-

Whitey: You've, you've, you've done... You're probably averaging one a month, I reckon, over the last six months. Yeah, there you go. Yeah. I would say so.

Will: Yeah. Very good.

Whitey: But, um- A

Dan: Greco- Grecoversary from the, the, the best actor in all of 21 Jump Street, Richard Grieco.

Is that correct?

Whitey: Yep. Wow. Yeah, Richard Grieco, who, who starred in 18 episodes of 21 Jump Street.

Dan: Excellent.

Whitey: Before he went and did Booker. And, uh- Booker ... yeah, Dennis Booker. Uh, but what we'll do is the next time you're on for your 19th, we'll make sure it's with Damo.

Will: Okay.

Whitey: Because what he does, he does a mean Grieco cake.

Will: Yeah, well I'm keen.

Whitey: His cake art is second to none. Mm. And, uh, and, and you won't miss out on that, trust me.

Will: Okay.

Whitey: Okay. We are of course Born To Watch, the movie podcast where we don't take ourselves or the movies too seriously, unless of course it's the Snobs Report, of which there'll be none tonight 'cause Damo's not here.[00:05:00]

Will: Mm.

Whitey: Uh, it's a shame 'cause Uma's Boomers, she gets in there a couple of times, and there would've been, I think Snobs Report wouldn't have been bad.

Will: Mm. Yeah, I mean, they're not the worst boomers.

Whitey: No. They're big. For

Will: sure. Yeah.

Whitey: They're big.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, we'll start overs and unders. 20, well, 2003 movie. 23 years old.

Now that is, I say it all the time, that's quite mind-blowing that this movie's 23 years old. I do remember the day that it came out I think this is conservative. It is definitely for me, 10. Overs and unders of 10. And do you remember the first time you saw it? And because Dan's eating, I'm gonna throw to you, Will.

Yeah,

Will: sure.

Whitey: Where do you sit there?

Will: I reckon I've, I've seen it about, ugh, six times over that, over that 23-year period. Uh, I'm trying to work out if I saw it at the movies. I feel like I would've, I would've, uh, I would've been about 18, 19 at the time.

Whitey: Oh, you definitely saw it at the movies.

Will: So I saw it at the movies.

Erin Fair? Yeah, [00:06:00] I reckon I shot up to Erin Fair. Definitely preferred that over Tuggerah Westfield.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: Place is a shithole, if anyone's thinking of buying a house at Tuggerah. Anyway.

Whitey: Oh, it's the Bakersfield.

Will: Yeah. Oh, it's horrible. Yeah. What a horrible joint. It's horrible. There's Wyong TAFE just up the road, though.

Picked up a cert four at that joint.

Whitey: Did you? Ah. Put

Will: my brains into house fitting. So it's not all bad.

Whitey: Well, led you... All roads led north.

Will: It did.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: Absolutely, it did. As soon as I picked up that ticket, mate, I was out of there.

Whitey: Game on.

Will: Straight up north to the border.

Whitey: That's it. Uh, Dan, what about yourself?

2003 movie, overs and unders 10, do you remember first seeing it?

Dan: Tuggerah sounds a lot like Narrabeen, Will. Just a shit joint. Mm.

Will: Shit people. There's more

Dan: ocean in Narrabeen

Will: than there is in Tuggerah.

Dan: Yeah.

Will: Definitely.

Dan: Just a stench of ne'er-do-wells, though. Ah. Um, I've seen it more than 10 times, Matthew White.

I had not seen it for a little while, though, so it was a bit of a refreshing view for me this time around, but definitely out [00:07:00] of 10. Did we see it together? Me and G would've been back from the travels. Yeah, G would've- Yeah, I would definitely- Yeah, we would've seen it together. This

Whitey: is... Yeah, yeah. I think we all saw it together.

Uh- Yeah ... I know for a fact we all saw it together. Saw it, uh, Warriewood. This is a Warriewood-

Dan: Uh, Ronald Starkey. Yeah, he would've been- This is Ronald Starkey ... heavily involved, yep.

Whitey: Yep, definitely. Uh, and- For me, I am, this is a lot. I'm 60.

Dan: Wow.

Whitey: Again, this is, this is for a long time, I reckon for 10 years, this was my go-to Tarantino movie.

So if I wanted to just kill some time, pardon the pun- ... uh, I'd throw Kill Bill: Vol 1 on. I'm not as fond of volume two. Yeah. But volume one is a hell of a lot of fun, and it's a very easy watch, and it is the perfect movie that you can come in at any time of the movie and it doesn't matter what [00:08:00] happened.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Because there is so little plot in this film that it doesn't matter.

Will: It's amazing.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: I really, I really enjoyed watching it.

Whitey: It's, it's a fun time. It... And you know what? Hour 51.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Hour 51. I'll show it. I reckon if he had tried, if this hadn't been split and he tried to do this as a three-hour thing, I think it flops.

Yeah. I just think it doesn't hold it, but I love the fact that this is an hour 51.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: I wanted more. It left me wanting more.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: So-

Will: And it's, but an hour 51 isn't short in its own right.

Whitey: No, it's not. It's not. But compared to what he's doing lately, it is. But com- And even, I think, I think volume two is around the same length.

But if you wanna, if you make a three-hour movie outta this, and I, I'm actually excited to see the whole bloody affair.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: Because they are releasing, well, it ha- it was released earlier in the year in the States, uh, for a very limited showing. Uh, so what [00:09:00] he's done is he's put them together. He's added some, uh, deleted scenes in and a lot more anime stuff.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Cool. Uh, and yeah, I think, I think that'll be pretty cool. Uh, but I think if, if he released this in 2003 as a three-hour thing, I don't think it, I don't think it hits as hard. Thoughts on that, Dan?

Dan: Yeah. I don't know. I think you guys have obviously had a fond revisit to this one. I don't know that I was as enamored on, on this viewing.

So yeah, I'm, I, I am interested to see what it looks like when it's all, uh, all together. And I think that that, that may then I'd, I'd definitely be willing to sit through that and would be interested to see what the extra scenes do. Uh, the, I think there was enough anime in the first one, but anyway, if you slip more in, sure, I'll take a look at it.

But yeah, I didn't, I didn't get the same jolliness in my dick and balls as you did for this revisit. So yeah, very interested to hear your takes, but I've probably got some counter takes that, uh, [00:10:00] Sloane's not gonna like. Oh, no, he's not a big Kill Bill guy. Oh, he's not a

Whitey: Tarantino

Dan: guy.

Whitey: No. We're safe here. I think we're safe with this

Dan: one.

Yeah. Anyway, let's, let's cr- crack on.

Whitey: Well, it sounds like it's gonna be a good podcast if, uh, if Dan's gonna-

Will: Well, that's why we have Dan ... Dan's- 'Cause he always offers the, uh, the other point of view.

Whitey: Well, generally he, he's pretty good at being a counterpoint.

Will: He's a miserable brick. Yeah. Yeah. You know, counter arguments- Counterpoints.

Whitey: Okay, here we go. Back of the VHS cover. "Four years after taking a bullet in the head at her own wedding, the Bride emerges from a coma and decides it's time for payback with a vengeance. Having been gunned down by her former boss and his deadly squad of international assassins, it's kill or be killed.

It's a kill or be killed fight she didn't start, but is determined to finish. Loaded with [00:11:00] explosive action and outrageous humor, it's a must-see motion picture event that has critics everywhere raving."

There we go. Bit better than Gale I reckon.

Dan: Ah, yeah. Yeah, it was way better than Gale.

Whitey: Yeah. Yeah. All right, now let's just roll straight into the trailer. So strap yourselves in. Kill Bill Vol. 1, here we go

Trailer: Not too long ago, I was quite the professional. My friends and I, we were the crème de la crème in an exclusive industry. And we all worked for this man, Bill. Then one day, I decided to leave, settle down, and start a new life. But when I tried to get out, they [00:12:00] did me in

Will: Now

Trailer: we're even. I guess they should have tried a little harder.

So I suppose it's a little late for an apology, huh? You suppose correctly. Now it's kill or be killed. You're

Will: very right. What can you

Trailer: do? Get even, even Steven? I would have to kill you. That'd be about square. And I choose kill.

Will: Baby,

Trailer: how was school? One ticket to Tokyo, please. One way

Will: Catwoman desires her revenge He deserved to

Trailer: die. No kidding. I heard it was kind of hard City Caucasian girl likes to play with samurai swords. Yeah. [00:13:00] Oh, any more subordinates for me to kill?

You didn't think it was gonna be that easy, did you? For a second there. Yeah, I kind of did. Silly rabbit

Will: Hard part's over

Whitey: [00:14:00] There we go.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Thoughts?

Will: I feel like they, uh, they give it a bit, bit more of a comedy slant in the, um-

Whitey: I

Will: don't- ... in the, yeah, in the short ...

Whitey: I don't think there's a lot of comedy in this movie, to be honest.

Will: No, but what they kind of

Whitey: imply- But they try to make it to be a little bit slapsticky-

Will: Yeah ...

Whitey: when it's not really.

When it- 'cause even in the back of the thing where it says, "Outrageous humor," I'm like, there's a little bit of funniness, which is just the T- Tarantino dialogue, but I don't think there's comedy in it.

Will: No, I mean, there is a couple of exchanges that I like, and, uh, we'll get, I suppose we'll get into a bit later on.

Yeah. But yeah, I'll, I'll, remind me to tell you what, what I thought was funny.

Whitey: Okay.

Will: Yeah, we

Whitey: will. Don't

Will: wanna give too much away. Oh, mate. Starting to learn, I'm starting to learn about this game, Dan. You know, you gotta hold your cards close to your chest. Yeah,

Dan: Gal and Whitey are the shittest at it. They'll come on and go, "I fucking love this movie," in the first two minutes.

And you're like, "Oh-

Will: Yeah ...

Dan: well, that's suspicious." It's,

Whitey: it's called premature adulation.

Will: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah,

Will: I'm learn- I'm working on my game. I like it. I've doubled up on the condoms this morning. [00:15:00]

Dan: Yeah,

Whitey: excellent.

Will: You learn every day, so.

Dan: Double rubber,

Whitey: no kissing. Doing your right click for extras. Yeah. Doing your right click for extras.

That's right. Uh- Critical thinking. Uh, IMDb rates Kill Bill: Vol 1 8.2 out of 10. It's number 153 in the top 200.

Dan: Wow.

Whitey: Certified Fresh, 85% on the Tomato Meter with an 81% Popcorn Meter, and it is 0% on the Cry Meter. Mm. Not a tear is shed-

Dan: No.

Whitey: No,

Dan: definitely ...

Whitey: in this film Now, 8.2 IMDb equals, here are movies that we have reviewed, 8.2.

Dan: Ooh.

Whitey: Top Gun: Maverick. Hmm. The Thing.

Dan: Wow.

Whitey: Die Hard.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: Full Metal Jacket.

Dan: Yep.

Whitey: Wolf of Wall Street. Mm-hmm. [00:16:00] LA Confidential, Jurassic Park, Snatch- Ooh ... and No Country for Old Men.

Dan: Wow. Esteemed company.

Whitey: Out of that, I think No Country is low at 8.2.

Dan: It's super low. Super low, yeah. Deserves- The more I watch that, the more I like it.

Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Yeah. It's incredible movie. So

Dan: good. Now- It's interesting you bring that up actually, because that's a really good comparison between this one and th- the stakes, I guess, for the protagonist and what we feel for Llewelyn Moss in No Country for Old Men. I would argue that I didn't feel that for The Bride.

I didn't really have a lot of tension throughout. I didn't really give a shit about... It was all very comical, whereas that one is more the, the heightened realism of- Yeah ... Llewelyn Moss, and you can really get behind him. D- Strange, like I wouldn't have thought to compare the two movies otherwise, but yeah, I think it's a, a [00:17:00] very interesting contrast between what Quentin's trying to do here, which is a comic book brought to life, versus No Country for Old Men.

Whitey: Well, I was gonna say, I think, I, I think this is the start of the fantasy era that is still continuing with Quentin. Mm. Like, you've got... This is a fantasy story. This is like a, a, a golden book for adults, a comic book. Mm. Yeah. Right? And then you've got, you know, you've got, uh, Inglourious Basterds, which is the re-imagining of World War II, which is a- Mm

which is a fairy tale. You've got Once Upon a Time in Hollywood, which is a fairy tale. You know, uh, it's... You've got... I think this is similar to those movies in that vein, that it's, it's in his, it's in Quentin's world.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: You know? And, uh, whereas, you know, you've got obviously Reservoir Dogs and Pulp, which are hyper-realistic like No Country for Old Men.

So I think this is him sort of having a little bit of fun, and I don't think it is for everyone. I agree, but yeah. We'll, we'll get a bit more to that. Now, Rotten Tomatoes [00:18:00] equals 85%. Two movies, The Batman, the new one, and The Thing.

Dan: Hmm.

Whitey: So there we go. A couple of reviews. Uh, Morgz Good or Bad.

Dan: He does go bad

Whitey: Bad.

Ed Gonzalez from Slant Magazine: "Kill Bill: Volume 1 is essentially a pop culture wanker's failed multimedia experiment. A vacuous junk heap of dorky gags and riffs, violent anime and offensive slapstick."

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah, you're not wrong.

It, it's... There's, there's not this- I think this is his least original film.

Will: Yeah, okay.

Whitey: Like he, he takes a lot from a lot of movies in all his movies.

Dan: I just- Well, should we go do that now? Uh- Let's look at some of [00:19:00] the movies that he steals from, or you wanna hit that later on?

Whitey: Hit that la- let's hit that a little bit later on, 'cause I know y- there's a, there's an exceptionally long list that we can discuss.

Dan: Oh, which Quentin's on record for. It, is, he doesn't claim this to be anything but a pastiche of his favorite- Yes ... um, kung fu movies, his spaghetti Western movies. There's a whole different genre- Yeah ... bending pastiche that he, he undoubtedly is, is proud of, and it makes the film far more style than substance, and I think that was what was glaring for me in this revisit.

I didn't, uh, I didn't get the fun as much as I did previously. Um, but yeah, keep going.

Whitey: Okay. Good review. Scott Weinberg. You, Lieutenant Weinberg- ... of efilmcritic.com. "A flick so knee-deep in its own genre worship that it should thrill movie fans the world over while giving the action junkies [00:20:00] a few extended sequences that they'll want to watch again and again."

Will: In its own genre worship, and that's a good point because I actually think Quentin Tarantino makes movies first and foremost-

Whitey: For Quentin Tarantino ... for

Will: Quentin Taran- Tarantino. 100%.

Whitey: Yeah. Definitely

Dan: this

Will: one. He's- Definitely this one ... just indulgent.

Whitey: Yeah. He's, uh, this is, this is extremely indulgent.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And I, I think he dials it back considerably for part two.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Which is why I think if it, it... Well, I'm really interested to see them together in how he makes that work because they are two completely different tones. Oh,

Dan: totally. They're com- Totally ... opposites.

Whitey: Absolutely.

Dan: K- Kill Bill 2's more like other Quentin bits- Qu- yeah

in that it's dialogue-heavy- Yeah ... and, you know, this one is, is comic book action. So no, I think that's a, that's a very valid point.

Whitey: Yeah, absolutely. Okay. Ordinary people. Uh, we're just gonna run very quickly through the, through the stars. Uma Thurman, obviously a Quentin Tarantino darling from Pulp [00:21:00] Fiction.

Uh, she plays The Bride, unless if no one knew that, but I'm sure everyone does. Um- Known for Pulp Fiction, obviously, and '94 Gattaca. Now, Morgs, you're a big Gattaca guy, aren't you? Gattaca,

Dan: love, love it. Gattaca is, uh, if you should watch Gattaca tomorrow, it's excellent, and I'm due a revisit for it. But yeah, her and Ethan Hawke, um, sci-fi dystopian type getup.

Really good. Yeah, I think. Yeah. And I, I was trying to think what have, what else have I enjoyed Uma Thurman in? And other than her foray into the, the Quentin universe and Gattaca, remind me what else I would have loved her in.

Whitey: Uh, well, not much, Daniel- No, no ...

Dan: because

Whitey: she was in Dangerous, Dangerous Liaisons in '88.

Dan: Oh, give me a break.

Whitey: As a very young g- uh, yeah, very young lady. Hmm. Batman and Robin in '97 as Poison Ivy. Oh, God. Oh, yeah, I remember that. Yeah. Tragic film.

Dan: Awful. Awful.

Whitey: And she was in, she was in the 1998 adaptation of [00:22:00] Les Mis- Oh, yeah

Dan: Oh, that wasn't the one with Russell Crowe- Oh, no, Russell Crowe ... singing a little flat.

No, not Russell Crowe.

Whitey: Yeah.

Dan: Russell Crowe- That guy's fucking talentless, Sydney. He should never pick up a guitar. Like fucking Rusty Crowe shouldn't just get on a podcast and do this. Like, that, I wouldn't if I was him, I just wouldn't do it.

Will: Put the guitar down, Dan.

Dan: Right.

Will: Stop doing

Dan: it.

Will: There's, there's love on the free love highway.

Dan: Pretty girl on the hood of a Cadillac, yeah. Yeah.

Will: We, Dan-

Dan: No, Rusty Crowe, one, yeah, one, um, Friends of Rom- Friends of Rom ... I think captured it nicely when they proclaimed Russell Crowe's band is a fucking piece of shit. I think they were- Yes ... succinct. Friends of Rom. And, uh- Yeah ... 30 Odd Foot of Grunt, or For the Ordinary Fear of God, or wha- or whatever names he came up for that absolute...

Like, the, the crux of it is he just can't sing. He's [00:23:00] a horrible- Correct ... singer with zero range and flat. But you put him up against Hugh Jackman in Les Mis, and there's someone who is a full triple threat, song and dance man- Yeah ... who just blows him away.

Whitey: Yeah. No, he, he, he should not sing. I, I love him as an actor.

I think he's a great actor. I think he's, he's very talented in that aspect. But just- Mm ... you and Bruce Willis should stop.

Will: Well, actually,

Whitey: great- Well, Bruce Willis can't anymore. Yeah. He did.

Will: Great question, and here's one just to step off the treadmill for a second. Should- Yeah ... any male movie star ever attempt to be the front man of a band?

And I'll give you the answer- I, I give- ... before you answer. I'll

Dan: give you two that

Will: I

Dan: like. No,

Whitey: he's, he's

Dan: gonna say Jared

Whitey: Leto. Okay. I reckon he's gonna say Jared Leto.

Will: No.

Whitey: He's gonna say Jared Leto.

Dan: No, no, no, no. I wasn't gonna say Jared Leto, actually. Although he is pretty good in F- and, um, in 30 Seconds or Less.

Doesn't mean he should do it. But no, I was gonna say Jeff Daniels, who-

Whitey: Ah ...

Dan: is an [00:24:00] exceptional guitarist and, uh, and singer. And Kevin Bacon, who plays with the Bacon Brothers, and also isn't too bad. That's right. So the... Yeah. Yeah, but, you know- So there's- ...

Whitey: yeah, I think, but I think that there's an element of piss-take in the Bacon Brothers.

Dan: Po- potentially. Right? Yeah.

Whitey: So- Do

Dan: you know who else was good? But whereas- You were talking about, um- X-Files before, David Duchovny picked up the guitar very late and has a talent for it and can sing. So he's, uh- Sure. Well, he also can- Yeah,

Will: so there- Johnny Depp should stop trying. Johnny Depp should stop trying.

No. I will give you, I will give you someone who's a great musician is, what's his name from Jurassic Park? Hmm. Jeff Goldblum. He's a great- Oh,

Dan: I didn't know that. Yeah ...

Will: great, really amazing jazz pia- um, pianist. Ah. Yeah. Yeah. He's

Dan: very

Will: good. Well,

Dan: if we're gonna talk about virtuosos, we really can't go past Steven Seagal.

No, we

Will: can't. We just can't.

Dan: Absolutely shreds, in all seriousness, shreds.

Will: Oh, he loves

Dan: to do it. [00:25:00] Yeah, so- He loves

Will: blues. Born

Dan: in, born in

Will: the South to a Black family. It's funny. This guy will claim anything, man. Bleeds blues. Yeah. No,

Dan: yeah. But that, that's an, that's an excellent question you posit. I mean, Johnny Depp has some talent there, to be said, but yeah, real superstar actor crossovers.

Yeah, very interesting. Um, what about, uh, the guy, um, the African American actor and rapper who's in Atlanta? Donald, Donald Glover. Oh, yeah. Donald

Will: Glover. Yeah. Yeah. Childish Gambino. Yeah,

Dan: he- Yeah,

Whitey: Childish Gambino.

Dan: Yeah. I mean, Childish Gambino. He's great. He's still Dorito. He's great. Really good. Oh, I think he's not

Will: big enough.

He didn't... He, he, he has been a, an absolute triple threat from the start though, that guy. Hmm.

Whitey: Yeah. From Community.

Will: I- That me- did you ever watch Community? Community. Great,

Whitey: great show. Did. Yeah,

Will: love

Whitey: it. Um, first three ep- first three seasons are great.

Will: So good.

Whitey: First three

Will: seasons. Yeah. Agreed.

Whitey: Uh, but yeah, look, I think there's a very small percentage that can.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And I think that the [00:26:00] time to start is not when you are a superstar actor.

Will: Now, if your profile's too

Whitey: big-

Will: Yeah ...

Whitey: do not Stu- do not do it.

Will: Yeah. Do it anyway. Don't, don't do it. Just do it in your bedroom. I think that's-

Dan: Do it in your

Will: bedroom like me. Yeah,

Whitey: yeah,

Will: yeah,

Whitey: yeah,

Will: yeah. Yeah. Or if you can't do it, play little venues like the Bacon Brothers.

Whitey: Yeah. The Ba- Like- Yes ... I think the Bacon Brothers, I think they're good. And I think there's mistakes.

Will: You gotta play little venues. You gotta play little- Yeah ... bars and stuff like... Anyway.

Whitey: Okay. All right. Next up, Lucy Liu, O-N-I-E-E. Charlie's Angels-

Dan: Beautiful,

Whitey: beautiful ... are stunning Actress Stunning.

Dan: Yeah,

Will: she's

Dan: gorgeous.

Whitey: Yeah, absolutely stunning. Yeah. Mm. Uh, she was in Charlie's Angels in 2000, Chicago 2002. She's in the Kung Fu Panda movies. Uh- Yeah ... uh, Lucky Number Slevin, which actually came out as a different title here in Australia, and I'm trying to think what it was called.

Dan: Yeah, I don't

Whitey: know. But, uh, that's a great movie with Josh Hartnett, and, uh, it's really, really good.

Oh, Josh Hartnett. Yeah. That's a

Dan: terrible title. Whatever the- what's the alternative?

Whitey: Yeah. Lucky Number Slevin. It was called, it's called something [00:27:00] else in Australia. I'll look it up. I'll have it by the end of the episode, but it's actually a really cool movie. It's a really cool movie. Uh, it's actually got Bruce Willis in it as well.

Uh, she's in Set It Up in 2018, but she's also in Ally McBeal from 199- It's known as The,

Dan: The Wrong Man in Australia

Whitey: The Wrong Man, that's right. Yeah. Which is- And it's great ...

Dan: which is also fairly, fairly ordinary.

Whitey: Lame. Pretty lame title, but it's really good. Um, and she's in Elementary, which is a Sherlock Holmes TV series.

Yeah. It has Jonny Lee Miller as Holmes- Ah, yes ...

Dan: and

Whitey: Lucy Liu as Watson.

Dan: That

Whitey: was

Dan: well-reviewed And it's

Whitey: excellent. Yeah. Yeah. I actually really enjoyed that. Yeah. Yeah. That was really

Dan: good.

Will: Whatever happened to Lucy Liu after bloody Ally McBeal?

Whitey: She's still with Harrison Ford.

Dan: Yeah. Well, she

Whitey: just, she married Harrison

Dan: Ford.

She copped 80, 80-year-old, um, yeah- Grumpiness ... uh, yeah, 80-year-old grumpiness and, um, medically assisted- I love it ... uh, sausage. Yeah.

Will: Yeah, I bet. I bet too. She'd have a great dining set, though, 'cause apparently he's a bit of a handy carpenter. I reckon he

Dan: [00:28:00] made it. Oh, that, yeah, super talented. Yes. He

Whitey: can fix the fuck out of a door jam.

Will: Yeah, he could. Yeah.

Whitey: That's what put him into Star Wars.

Will: Scribe down a bloody kick on a kitchen bench.

Whitey: Definitely. Any day

Trailer: of

Will: the week.

Whitey: Lucy Liu is a standout in this movie. Yeah. And she's excellent. She's good. She's good. I like her a lot. I think she's got one of the best characters.

Will: Yeah, she's

Whitey: great. She's actually got a bit of flesh.

She gets to flesh a bit out, and what she is, I think it's good. Uh, Vivica A. Fox, Venida Green.

Dan: Oh,

Whitey: another gorgeous, gorgeous woman. Now, very attractive, very attractive. Independence Day, 1996 with Will Smith.

Dan: Wow.

Whitey: She's Will Smith's sugar mama. She plays his strip-at girlfriend. Yeah. Strip-at girlfriend. Yeah,

Dan: he, he sure flips the pooty like how you used to do in Canada.

Whitey: Big time. Big time. Mm. Big time. Uh, Set It Off in '96, Soul Food, '97. She really, and I've actually got it in my good... Quentin Tarantino has a knack of taking people that aren't very good and [00:29:00] making them quite good. Mm. She's, I think he's only failed once, and that's with the s- with, um- The Kiwi girl who's the stunt girl.

Oh, Zoe

Dan: Bell in,

Whitey: yeah Zoe Bell. She just, she is a wonderful stunt woman- True ... and a terrible actress.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: And a terrible actress. Mm. She is the worst part of every Tarantino movie. Oh. And almost

Dan: ruins Death

Whitey: Proof for me.

Dan: I would also suggest putting himself in his movies. He's always the- Yeah. No, I agree.

Yeah. You think about him in Django with John Jared.

Whitey: Well, why did he do an Australian, why did he do an Australian accent?

Will: Because he-

Dan: He obviously thinks it's good ... was directed for Quentin

Will: Tarantino. That's-

Dan: Well, you've got a good story about that too, Matthew, which you should drop at some stage.

Whitey: Uh, about, about-

Dan: Quentin's Australian accent.

Whitey: Quentin's Australian ac- I, I'm not sure what scene was that? Yeah, the steak

Dan: dinner. At the steak

Whitey: dinner. Oh, the steak dinner. That was for Inglourious Basterds. Yeah. Yeah, that was great. When I saw him, [00:30:00] uh, I'd left and I was walking up and he came out of the alley, and, uh, he was there. He was like where you were, and we sort of almost ran into each other and I go, "Oh, Quentin, yeah, great movie, mate."

And he goes, "Thanks, mate." And, uh, and that was essentially it. And I walked off and I was like- Ah ... I got so fucking starstruck. I bet. I got so fucking starstruck. Oh, yeah. Mate, he's tall. God. He's really tall.

Will: Right.

Whitey: Yeah, he's really tall. Um, uh, okay, Daryl Hannah. Now, if we talk about- It's a bit of a, uh, pastiche of different-- That's been used a lot

Will: this podcast.

It has, yeah. So let's go with that.

Whitey: But it is- If you said

Will: that one more time- It

Whitey: is- ... I

Will: was gonna fly kick you across the room.

Whitey: But in terms of, in terms of, uh, actors and genres and, and, uh, I guess, uh, decades of when they worked on that, but Daryl Hannah. So everyone has been a bit, "How you going?" With who, what were they in?

Listen to this top five for [00:31:00] Daryl Hannah. Blade Runner, '82. Mm. Wow. Splash, '84. Splash as well. Wall Street, '87. Steel Magnolias, '89.

Dan: Amazing.

Whitey: And Roxanne, '87. Mm.

Dan: Wowzer.

Whitey: Like she was in, she was in, she was in a few films in the '80s.

Dan: She was the girl.

Whitey: She was

Dan: the girl.

Whitey: Yeah. Yeah. She was.

Dan: And she was like, "I'll take that."

He's 24-inch pythons and she had her 32-inch legs or something, wasn't it, the-

Whitey: Yeah, she's-

Dan: She got those, she got those long-ass legs.

Whitey: Yeah. In, in Blade Runner, she's stunning.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: Like she's so good in Blade Runner as that Sil. Is that her name, Sil? Yeah, Sil. Think it's Sil.

Dan: Always loved Sil.

Whitey: Maybe. No, it's not Sil.

Something, something like that though. Uh, okay. Again, she gets nothing to do. Her comeuppance is coming in volume two where she plays a much bigger role.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, now David Carradine plays- The, the, the soundtrack is off the chart again. Mm. Mm. [00:32:00] Yeah, like he just nails it every time. But David Carradine, been around forever.

Morgan's got a great story about the death of David Carradine. Um, I've heard that-

Will: But- I've heard Dan wants to go out in exactly the same way. Same

Dan: way.

Whitey: Yeah,

Dan: same way. I think every man should, uh, should really go out... I was just more impressed that he was 72 when he was, uh- Yeah ... found in a puddle in a, a Thai hotel room with a belt.

When you've walked

Will: the earth, when you've walked the earth in the, in the pursuit-

Whitey: Tain- tain of kung fu ...

Will: of top dog-

Dan: He's experienced everything. He just had one last frontier to find, and that was- It was his last mile

Will: decline there.

Whitey: Yeah. I'm gonna go, I'm, I'm gonna be the first guy to nail autoerotic asphyxiation.

Yeah.

Dan: I mean, I, I don't, I don't know how horny I'll be at 72, but to string myself up in a Thai hotel room with a belt around my neck [00:33:00] and wanking furiously, I, uh, it's not the path I had in mind for myself, but who am I to say that's not the same way I'll

Will: die? Mate, the,

Whitey: the concern, the concern I have for me with that is, fuck, it's gotta be a big door.

Yeah, it does. It's gotta be

Will: a

Whitey: sturdy... Like, we're talking fire doors.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Like, I'm dying in a fire escape.

Will: You

Whitey: gotta

Will: get some- Yeah. You gotta get some belay rope on that thing as well. Yeah. Like, it's gotta have some load rating to it. Yeah.

Whitey: You know, it's like I was, I was, uh, I was talking, I was talking to, um, a, a mate of mine, a big, really brand, sort of new, big listener to the podcast, which is, um, my mate from Currumbin Fair Bakery, Nathan.

Will: Oh.

Whitey: Right? I know Nathan. And, uh, he's a legend.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And, and, uh- Legend ... he's, he's hurt his wrist, so he's not being able to train. Yeah. And he works hard and, and we're at footy on Saturday, and he watching, 'cause Luke's back, so we're watching him play and, and, uh, I go, "How's it going?" [00:34:00] He goes, like, "Fucking terrible."

I go, "Really that bad?" He goes- There's just not a tree big enough for me.

Dan: And

Whitey: I go, "No, no, you're wrong. You're wrong. The trees are big enough, it's the branches that are going

Dan: on your dance."

Will: Yeah. But so- Yeah. Yes,

Whitey: David

Dan: Carradine, uh, went in a spectacularly, uh, amusing and weird way. However, the cunt was in Thailand. I could think of 150 other ways that you could get your rocks off that didn't end up with you dying in a cupboard.

So-

Whitey: Yeah ...

Dan: yeah, if we meet in the afterlife, I'll have a, have a chat with David Carradine. Well,

Will: nobody knows how long he was in Thailand for. Maybe he made his way through every frigging option there was, and that was what was left.

Whitey: Well, Thailand

Dan: took a couple.

Whitey: T- Thailand took a couple legends.

Dan: Yeah. Warnie, great man.

Yeah. Great man,

Will: mate.

Dan: Mm.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Probably in similar circumstances.

Dan: Oh, yeah. I mean, [00:35:00] there's a guy, that's a guy that's, uh, emptied a lot of splooge on the world- Oh, yeah ... so he was always doing something different.

Whitey: As, um, Morks would say, um, creating little Warnies with his spoof sack.

Will: Yes.

Dan: The

Will: guy was

Dan: perpetually

Will: empty, I'll tell you that right now.

Dan: It couldn't have

Will: been hard.

Dan: And he was like down in the '90s, it was always high-grade phalange that he was-

Will: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah ... he was dumping in, yeah.

Will: By the afternoon, you're coughing up talcum powder, aren't

Whitey: you?

Will: Yeah. Not

Dan: Warnie. You're

Will: done. You're done. Yeah.

Whitey: Look, Shane Warne, any Australian man idolised, every Australian man idolised Shane Warne.

I don't think there was a, a man that followed Australian sport that did not think Warnie was the king. Yeah. And then he went and rooted Liz Hurley. Oh. And he confirmed it. He became a God. He became, he, he became a God.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: He, he, there is- So true.

Will: He-

Whitey: Thank God above me ... like, you didn't, [00:36:00] just when you thought, it's the same as in Dumb and Dumber.

It was so

Will: out of script. Just when you thought- Everyone was

Whitey: just like, "

Will: Whoa." It's like, "Where did Liz

Whitey: Hurley come from?" How the fuck did he meet her?

Will: What the-

Dan: Mate, she's, she's 60 now and is still a 15 out of 10. It's crazy. Yeah. Mate, she's

Whitey: unbelievable. Yeah, yeah.

Dan: But what about his character arc? He s- he started eating, only eating baked, baked beans.

He was- Yeah ... he was a little bit tubby. He was still doing well. He got skinny, he got a vineyard, and he rooted Liz Hurley. Like, what a character arc.

Whitey: Yeah. Yeah, no, a legend. Just a legend. But okay, back to David Carradine, uh, famously took the role from Bruce Lee for Kung Fu. Yeah. That was a role that was supposed to be for Bruce Lee, but Hollywood wasn't ready for a Asian leading man.

No. Yeah. Not quite. Which is, which is sad. Yeah. Uh, [00:37:00] ironic that he stars in a movie that is a ode to Bruce Lee.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Almost. Mm-hmm. Uh, but, uh, Michael Madsen as Bud only has a very small part. His, his, his time comes in, in chapter two. It's

Will: never a surprise seeing Michael Madsen in a Tarantino film,

Whitey: hey? And he's, and, and look- No

and RIP. He, we lost him recently. Mm. Uh, he, he was... I, I thought he was an excellent actor, and I thought he got- Didn't do enough good movies.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: And I think that- The Vega

Dan: brothers, the Vega brothers needed to happen ...

Whitey: it's a shame that never happened. Yeah. That would've been amazing. But, uh, he missed the boat on that obviously before- No, they just, they aged

Dan: out

Whitey: unfortunately

Dan: it was too late.

Whitey: Yeah, just aged out. But- Yeah.

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: but, like, Reservoir Dogs, Donnie Brasco, Free Willy-

Dan: He's good in

Whitey: Donnie Brasco ... Species.

Dan: Mm.

Whitey: He's good in Donnie Brasco. Oh, and The Chant. He plays in Species.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Oh, God. Gow does an incredible kick [00:38:00] ass out the kill seal. Uh, which, which was one of the first, one of the first Hershfelder, uh, com- compositions.

Will: Ah. Uh,

Whitey: and, and he's also in Sin City. And, and I think he's that, he's old Hollywood, Michael Madsen. Yeah. Yeah. He's old Hollywood. Yeah. That sorta back in the James Dean sort of, you know, that old Hollywood leading man sorta look, ruggedly handsome.

Dan: He's not gonna be in The Birdcage with Robin Williams, is he?

He's, uh-

Whitey: He is not ... he's

Dan: definitely, no.

Whitey: He's no Hank Azaria.

Dan: No.

Whitey: No. No. Then, uh, then a couple of the, uh, we've got Sonny Chiba, who plays Tohtori Hansol. Mm. Tohtori Hansol.

Will: Uh,

Whitey: who, that, that sushi bar scene is fucking hilarious.

Will: Yeah. That's the one I'm talking

Whitey: about. That sushi bar scene is very funny.

Will: It's, that's classic slapstick right

Whitey: there.

That is. That's the, that's the bit where it's... But it is actually funny. I love the bit when you just hear the, the, the sake bottle break.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, of Tohtori

Dan: [00:39:00] Hansol.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, and then, and then, uh, Chiaki Kuriyama, who plays Gogo. Now she was in the great 2000 movie Battle Royale, Japanese, uh, which there'd been,

Dan: uh, video games- Playing a similar character.

I mean- Yeah ... not, not well. Yeah. Yeah, sim- yeah, she was in a schoolgirl outfit and- Yep. She- Yeah ... yeah, she, uh, the, the scene with her and the salaryma- salaryman, salaryman, where she penetrates him- Oh, God ... uh, taken from a similar plot line in Battle Royale when she does it to her classmate. So it's, yeah- Yeah

it was nothing more than a, than outright homage/rip-off.

Whitey: Yeah, absolutely. Uh, just give me one

Dan: second. But that's another one if we... Check out Battle Royale. That's, uh, that and Oddball, if you wanna see some incredible Asian cinema. Oddball?

Whitey: Oldboy.

Dan: Oddball. Oldboy. Od- Oldboy. Oldboy. Oldboy. Oddball. What a fucking idiot.

Oldboy and Battle Royale. Yeah, that's what you wanna see. Yeah, I was like Oddball. That's what I was thinking

Whitey: of. [00:40:00] Battle Royale is one of the best Japanese movies I've ever seen.

Dan: Yeah, really good.

Whitey: It, it... Have you, do you know the premise of it? Yeah. So year nine, year nine students, it's in, it's in a dystopian future.

Year nine class gets selected And they get taken to an island and it's fight to the death. Oh. It's fight to the death. It's- Fanta, you gotta tell me though, you know- Like there'd be no Squid Game. Yeah. There'd be no Hunger Games. There'd be nothing. Your old boy would have loved it. Love it, right. There would be nothing.

Okay. So $30 million budget for this one. Uh, about 100- It seems right

Dan: on, doesn't it, compared to these days? My goodness.

Whitey: It does.

Will: 30 mil, yeah. It is

Whitey: pretty- Yeah. Uh, worldwide total of about 182 million. Opened at number one, uh, with 22.2 million across over, well, over 3,000 theaters. Uh, a- and it was actually more than double what Pulp Fiction and Jackie Brown each did on their opening weekends.

Yeah, I believe it. They both did nine, about $9 million each.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. So-

Dan: He made R.B. [00:41:00] once then quite a bit of wedge.

Whitey: Oh, didn't he what?

Dan: Mm.

Whitey: Didn't he what? What a grub that guy was.

Dan: Oh, yeah.

Whitey: Is he still around

Will: or is he dead?

Whitey: He's in jail. Oh, no, I think he's still in jail. Yeah. Yeah,

Will: he's still in jail, eh? Yeah,

Whitey: he's still in jail.

Dan: Unauthorized tampering. What a grub.

Whitey: Yeah, not good. It's, yeah, not good. What a grub. 2003 hit sleeper dud. Now, Dan-

Dan: Yeah. Did you tell us the hit? Do you have the hit? I can't remember. Oh, there we go. Here we go. I'll tell you what it wasn't, it wasn't the number three movie for the year, which was The Matrix Reloaded.

What a stealing pile of shit that was. And it wasn't num- the number eight movie, The Matrix Revolutions. How

Will: does that work?

Whitey: Okay. Can I do my duds? Can I do my duds? Yeah,

Will: go on.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: One-two punch. Yeah. Matrix Reloaded and Revolutions. Number three and number eight. Yeah. The funny thing is, is they did $1.3 billion between them.

Will: That's wowsers. And they [00:42:00]

Whitey: were- Was

Will: it Alvy Brothers, Sisters? What are the guys who made-

Whitey: Oh, Lana and, uh- Flan is one of them

Will: Yeah

Whitey: And I can't, I don't know what the other one is. But the only thing worse than Matrix Reloaded and Revolutions is the fourth one Oh, yeah Which

Dan: is

Whitey: a fucking tragedy

Dan: Yeah

Whitey: Anyway, uh, so what have you got to hit then?

Dan: Oh, look, it's pretty tough. Um, I mean, I'm not a Lord of the Rings dork, so number one really difficult. Finding Nemo I enjoy and watched a lot with the girls when I was, uh, when they were super young kids. I like The Last Samurai. Um- That's a big F Other than that, The Village I don't mind with Joaquin.

That's pretty cool

Whitey: Yep

Dan: Um, M. Night Shyamalan. Uh, other than that, they can all kind of get fucked really. I, I, yeah, I'll go with The Village.

Whitey: Okay. Too easy. Will, you've got the sleeper.

Will: Yeah. What did you guys think of Big Fish?

Whitey: I really liked it. You loved

Dan: it, right? I [00:43:00] like Big Fish. Is that Cate Blanchett? No, uh, it's

Whitey: Ewan McGregor It's

Will: Ewan McGregor I had Eddie Vedder

Dan: Oh, I know what you mean.

Yeah, yeah, sorry. Yeah, I, I was thinking of the, uh, the, the heroin one though. Okay. Yeah, I know the one you mean. Yeah. And that is also a good one. Yeah,

Will: it's my sleeper.

Whitey: Yeah. Big Fish is great. It's like a fairy tale, another fairy tale.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, Ewan McGregor connecting with his dad, Albert Finney-

Will: Yeah ...

Whitey: is his dad.

Will: Pouring through- Yeah ... his elaborated stories- Yeah ... trying to work out if he-

Whitey: If it was real or not real Yeah. Yeah, it's great. Really good. Really good. Good call. Uh, there's, uh, we don't have a small report tonight with, uh, with Damon not here, so there's two movies to not watch-

Dan: Yeah. ...

Whitey: and to avoid at all costs in your life.

Dan: Yeah, no, 2003 is a bit of a stinker. Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Two, two movies to watch and, uh, none to use. So-

Will: Yeah. Well, I mean, there are some feet. It is a, it is a terrible

Dan: movie Yes. I mean, if you're a... Do you know who that, uh,

Whitey: uh-

Dan: Oh, just, I was just gonna say, a friend of the podcast, [00:44:00] Matt Wilton, he's a, I remember he was a, a, a feet guy, so he probably jazzed his pantaloons watching this one.

Whitey: Yeah. I don't know. I've got a question coming up very soon on, on feet. Okay. So hang

Dan: in there.

Whitey: All right. Question time.

Dan: There you go. What a goinky-dink.

Will: Like right now or...?

Whitey: Yeah, right now. All right. Hang on. Has- Oh, the

Dan: suspense.

Whitey: Yeah, there's... I know. Just hold your horses. Has Bill banged all the Vipers or is he just a blonde guy?

Oh, that's a great question. 'Cause he's now on, uh, he's now on to Daryl Hannah. Yeah. And he was, he was banging beaches. Yeah. So you think he's given Venita and, uh, Oren a bit of a go?

Will: Or

Whitey: do you think he's a blonde guy?

Will: I reckon, I mean, if he's, if he knows what he's doing, he'd probably double across the whole roster.

Okay. You think

Whitey: he would, wouldn't you? Wouldn't you?

Will: Yeah.

Dan: I, I don't think over the, either movie it was remotely explained why Bill had this hold over any of the girls, and those two particularly. There is no character [00:45:00] identification of why this was all happening the whole time, and that's one of my bugbears I had from this viewing.

It was like, "Huh? What? What? This doesn't make any sense."

Whitey: Yeah. See, I'm, I'm willing to let that go. But I, I, when, when you mentioned that you watched it and, and I got an inkling that you might've been a bit negative about it- Hmm ... straightaway thought that there's no plot, there's no character. There's no character in this movie at all.

You don't know why they do what they do. You don't know who they do. You don't know anything.

Will: No.

Whitey: Right? Uh, which is, there's room there. There, there's probably room there for it to be a bloody 10 episode, um- Series ... you know, series. Yeah. Like Prestige

Dan: TV. No, any, any of the flashbacks in the anime you see of Bill, like, the guy just looks like the devil incarnate.

Yes. And yet he's got this hold over these, uh, these women that are in his, his Fox Force Five or whatever they're called. The Viper Squad. Um- Devil Vipers.

Whitey: Divas ...

Dan: Devilish Vipers. Yeah. It just- no. Not, not enough, Quentin. I needed, I needed to have some [00:46:00] inkling as to what they saw in old David Carradine before he wanked himself to death.

Whitey: Yeah. Okay. Um, is Buck one of cinema's greatest creeps? Oh

Dan: This is one of the things I despised the most about it. I, this was just revolting on the revisit. It made my stomach churn, that whole scene. Like, it was just full gross out, and I didn't find it pleasant at all. It was just like, ugh, and I'm glad he got what was coming to him.

But yeah, that was just pretty revolting.

Will: And it also, um, it also kind of makes you creep out even more when probably most of the executive team were like, "Nah, we're not having that." And one guy in there goes, "Keep it." And that

Whitey: would've been Weinstein. Do you think that

Dan: would've been

Whitey: Weinstein? Ugh.

Weinstein's like-

Will: Yeah ... "

Whitey: Quentin, Quentin, you [00:47:00] should keep that." I like

Will: it. I like it.

Whitey: Yeah.

Dan: We, we needed to hate that orderly in order for her to escape, I get it. But- Yeah ... the chosen plot device was grim. It's classic

Will: Tarantino, like, to take something and then just make it that uncomfortable level of- Yeah ... he, he likes

Dan: to just- That's a good scene for Kill Bill.

It's just- Yeah. Yeah ... the, uh, yeah, complete shock value.

Whitey: Yeah. It, it's an incredible, it's an incredibly uncomfortable scene.

Will: Yeah.

Dan: And it's- Super uncomfortable.

Whitey: Yeah. And, and

Dan: then- That, that slaughtering with the grime and the pubes and everything on it was just- The pubes ... ugh, dude. The pubes. That's our

Whitey: lubes.

You could get pubes on a school bus.

Dan: That, that is burnt onto my retina. That was, oh, Jesus. That is

Whitey: funny. Oh, made me laugh. Yeah. Uh, okay. What is a four-year-old girl doing on a school bus?

Dan: Yes. Another, uh, plot hole. It's really

Whitey: odd. No, but yeah, how old are you? I'm four. Yeah. Okay, what the fuck are you doing on a school bus at

Dan: four?

Why did she have to be four? Why, why couldn't you have made her seven? Like, I don't know, it's just [00:48:00] weird.

Whitey: Well, because she wasn't pregnant when she was 15.

Dan: Ah.

Whitey: No.

Dan: As soon as those words came out of my mouth, I knew that that was the case. Yeah.

Whitey: So they, they've had kids around the same time.

Dan: Yeah. Okay.

Whitey: Um-

Dan: But yeah,

Whitey: four.

She's a

Dan: very high-functioning four-year-old.

Whitey: Wasn't she? Yeah. Pretty young thing, like- Yep. Yeah ... I, yeah, but, uh, but yeah, don't know what she's doing on a school bus Why is it only Beatrix's... Fuck. Why is it only the bride's legs that are intubed? If she's been- Yeah ... in a coma, wouldn't you assume she can't- So that exactly

Dan: was another bone bearer I had to take-

really use

Whitey: her arms either ...

Dan: c- coming out of Buck, I was like, "What? This makes no sense whatsoever." Yeah.

Whitey: So I thought that that was a little odd. Oh, you know

Dan: what I think- It seems like an elaborate setup for this fuckhead's foot fetish. That was the only reason that- Yeah, 100% ... that happened.

Whitey: 100%.

Will: I mean, it was, you know, I mean, I, I shouldn't have been the only guy to [00:49:00] pick up the homage to, uh, bloody Steven Seagal.

Another great martial artist- ... that gets messed

Whitey: up in a coma. Absolutely.

Will: Had to find his way out of it, mate.

Whitey: The, we just needed the, we just need them to lift up and look at the size of her vag. That's quite a big vag. That's

Will: right.

Whitey: Oh, it's quite a big one. Please wake up.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Please wake up.

Will: Brings a pussycat into the hospital.

Whitey: My God. Okay, so the next- Oh, wow. Good

Dan: pick up, Will.

Whitey: How does she spend 13 hours in the pussy wagon? Without anyone checking on the murdered guy's partner Another

Dan: thing that I've got a problem with. It's like you were in my brain when I was watching it on Friday night or Saturday night. Yeah. Yeah, it's like, what?

So they found two dead guys in her room and they didn't bother to check downstairs? What do you mean? So, so it's

Whitey: got to go in an

Dan: old people's unit There would be 100 cops around that joint. Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Okay, let's keep rolling on this, 'cause the next question is- ... do, do they have coma wards like [00:50:00] this which seem to be down the ass end of the, the hospital?

And surely she's connected to machines that would alert someone that she's woken up.

Will: Ah, it's madness.

Whitey: And that c- look, and this is like trying to find things This fuck

Will: just walking up going, "Bang, bang, bang. Time's up, buddy." Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. What, what is his

Dan: care?

Will: People fucking Nothing else is going on.

What's going on with that?

Whitey: And, and let, let's start, how does an orderly get a job with "fuck" tattooed on his fingers?

Will: How do you get a stranger in? How do you get multiple

Whitey: strangers in? Oh, that's amazing. Yeah. That's amazing. Uh, okay. Is the slicing of the Achilles tendons- Oh ... tendon one of the most shocking things ever?

I felt a- Yeah.

Dan: I turned away. I couldn't watch it. I couldn't watch it. It was a flinch moment. I turned my, I shut my eyes and turned away. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. That was

Whitey: grim. Like, that is just grim. Grim's a good word for it. Yeah.

Will: Yep.

Whitey: Yeah. Oh, even now I'm thinking about it It's

Dan: like when they, they replay the footy injuries on, like, on the NRL, I can't watch it.

Yeah. When there's [00:51:00] a hip drop or something, I just can't, I can't. Yeah.

Whitey: So we've mentioned this a bit already, but are Uma's feet even that good? She's got that second big toe thing going on, where the second toe is bigger than the big toe.

Dan: I think you've gotta be a foot guy to, to answer that. To, to me, yeah, they just, like, look like a kind of pair of manky big feet.

Like, I didn't-

Whitey: Yeah.

Dan: I've never got, uh, Quentin's... I've seen, I've seen much better, shall we put it that way? Yeah,

Whitey: I agree. I agree.

Dan: I

Whitey: agree. Um-

Dan: I have particularly dainty feet, Will, and I've thought that I, I reckon there's a market for me to paint my toenails and put on some high heels and get them on the internet You're never gonna know unless

Will: you give it a shot, mate.

Dan: I reckon I should. I reckon-

Whitey: Morgs, you've got the hairiest top of your feet. You're like

Dan: Hobbit. You're a Hobbit I think it, I think it's offset by the daintiness, and I think there'd be a market. I reckon- There's a market. They're quite a

Will: niche

Dan: market. Yeah. They're really, they're, they're- [00:52:00] Yeah. I reckon I w- I, Will, I, I'll report back 'cause I reckon I'm onto something here.

If...

Will: Well, actually, listeners out there, if you actually have a, uh, you know-

Dan: Reach out. I can do private. Yeah. Yeah, private shows, that's fine.

Whitey: Maybe the, maybe all the hair is like a, like a bit of a jizz landing spot.

Will: Could, will it catch

Dan: the jizz? Well, that's it. I, I mean, I've thought ahead about if I would rope myself and, and send them that way.

Like, yeah, I can stage it however you like, people. You just... Good grief. Rope

Whitey: myself.

Will: You and David Carradine, mate. Wow.

Whitey: Unbelievable. Uh, okay. Like two more questions, and we, we... Morgs, I think I might know what you have got to say about this, but what are your thoughts on the anime sections?

Will: I like it.

Whitey: Yep. I think they're well done.

I

Dan: think, I think in 2003 I thought, "Oh wow, that's, that's really interesting." And 'cause I've never been an anime guy too, so I don't know the background of it. Yeah. From anime nerds, it doesn't really compare to [00:53:00] some of the top anime shows. Yeah. But this time around I was just kinda like, "Oh, it's just more style over substance here."

So I didn't, I didn't cop out as

Whitey: much. There's a lot of style in this movie. There is a lot of style in this movie.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, okay, last question. Is the showdown at the House of Blue Leaves one of the greatest action scenes ever filmed?

Will: Yeah, I reckon, well, that's a big

Whitey: call. It's complex. Yeah. It's extremely complex.

Dan: We're gonna talk a bit about that in film school for F-WITS. Okay. Uh, yes. I'll reserve my, uh, my answer, but we'll talk more about

Whitey: it. Okay. Easy.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: I, I love it.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: I think it's amazing from start to finish.

Will: Yeah. It's a, a very, very long sequence of-

Whitey: I love the music. I love the In the Snow. I think the In the Snow is my favorite part of the whole thing.

When they start playing Don't Be Misunderstood.

Dan: Mm.

Whitey: It, it- they just get the music right- Mm ... throughout all his movies. And Morbs and I talk about it a lot, [00:54:00] but-

Dan: Mm.

Whitey: This movie, this, like, apart from the five, six, seven, eights, which I think they're fucking terrible. They're terrible.

Dan: They're, they're, they're awesome terrible.

Like, they're-

Whitey: Yeah,

Dan: they're aw- They're like Emily and the Sniffers. Awesome terrible.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Absolutely.

Will: Yeah. Pussy Riot. Awesome terrible.

Dan: Pussy Riot. Exactly. Yeah.

Whitey: Okay, gents. Well done. Born to Watch OnlyFans.

Dan: Holy cow. Will, did you listen to the 80s action movie episode? And do you agree with the entire F-WIT diaspora that I was obviously the winner of that particular showdown, even when I was taking the piss for four-tenths of my, my selections?

Will: Look, I think that every week you come on, mate, you, you put on a good showing and you have great honest reviews, uh, as does everyone else. But just between you and I, I think you [00:55:00] did pretty good that night, mate. Thanks, mate. Thanks,

Dan: mate. I think you had

Will: a good selection.

Dan: Yeah. And Officer and a Gentleman and Iron Eagle were inspired choices.

Yeah

Will: Yeah, there was a bit of, um, there was a little bit of, um, underhandedness, which I enjoyed. You, you- Yes ... you know, particularly stealing some other people's, uh, picks.

Dan: Yeah. It was g- it was good to steal Whitey's favorites, uh, and everyone had a good go at those. So that, that was, that was amusing. I've talked to Whitey about the rules for next time.

I personally think there were far too many movies to choose from. I think if there's 40 picks, there needs to be 40 movies, so you're left with absolute dregs at the end. But yeah, it was a, it was a good exercise, and I think you'll agree I smashed everyone.

Whitey: Yeah, righto. Righto. Uh, okay. First I want to talk about a few comments that we've gotten on, on Spotify from a few episodes.

Uh, one... Now, I had to do a solo pod this week, or last week, 1982 year in review- We call that fucking lookouts ... because someone let me down. We call it middies It wasn't supposed to [00:56:00] be a solo, wasn't supposed to be a solo episode, but it was solo.

Dan: He's putting one on me, Will, and the surf was pumping, so what am I gonna do?

Whitey: So, uh, I did mention a movie in there, The Pirate Movie, which is an old sort of kids movie that I sort of grew up with, and- I

Dan: can remember that too. I can't, I can't

Whitey: remember

Dan: it vividly ...

Whitey: I don't, look, you won't remember it fondly- Mm ... because it's rubbish, but it's one of those movies I saw as a kid. Uh- Mm

but Dustman95, "I have The Pirate Movie from '82. Feel free to let me know if you want it. I'll send it via WeTransfer."

Dan: What a boss.

Whitey: Like, Dustman, it's game on. Send it.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: Let's do this. My man's

Dan: a dustman, he wears a dustman's hat. Well

Whitey: done. Let's do this.

Dan: And, um- You sound like a good cunt, Dustman. Well played

Whitey: he does. He sounds like a legend. Mm. And, uh, a- appreciate you listening and appreciate The Pirate Movie. Let's make it happen. Uh- Yeah ... Nathan, uh, I think this is our, uh, a smart-ass mate from the bakery. Right.

Will: Uh, with a, with a very, very curious wrist [00:57:00] injury.

Whitey: Yeah, very curious wrist injury. Uh, his comment- David

Dan: Tony-esque

Whitey: yeah, his comment, "What other alcoholic beverages would you recommend team leader Captain Whitey?" Smart arse. Oh. Considering that I'm not a huge drinker, but I do like the Matso's chili lime, uh, natys. You've had a few

Dan: beers. You were in the States recently. I saw you on the piss at the Yankees game. I saw you,

Whitey: you're sucking on a big old pour.

Uh, I don't, I had one of the, I had a couple of the world's biggest beers. Uh-

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: now, the '80s Action Movie Draft, uh, Jason Tyler Kushnerick, uh, made a comment, "No mention of To Live and Die- Bit of a garbler there, mate. Too many names ... yeah, a lot of names. "But no mention of To Live and Die in L.A. That movie is superior to a bunch of these picks."

And you know what, Jason? I've only just discovered To Live and Die in L.A. with William Petersen and Willem Dafoe. I watched it about a month ago, and [00:58:00] I completely forgot about it for the '80s action movie draft. It was in my longer list.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: It's a fucking cracker.

Dan: Oh, okay.

Whitey: It's a cracker. So- School and,

Dan: school and the captain.

Whitey: Yeah. So, uh, thanks Jason for that. Uh, it's, it's, it's definitely been, it's definitely been watched. Steven Tyler

Will: and Tom Cruise next week. So calm,

Dan: calm down on the double banger surnames. Yeah. But yeah, it's good, uh, good insights.

Whitey: Okay. So there's a few, uh, little comments that on, on Shopify. Shopify. There's a few comments on Spotify.

You can leave them, uh, and you'll get read out on the show. Now we've got a couple, uh, a couple, um, voicemails here from, from- Oh ... some of the, uh, the old guard. And our good old mate Chuppa's, he's backed up. Oh, Chuppa's. He's got a couple. He's got a couple. This is the first one that I was supposed to release a couple weeks ago, but it got missed.

And then last week I didn't wanna do it for the solo pod, that wasn't supposed to be a solo pod. And then, so today we're gonna do part one of Chuppa's [00:59:00] double shot voicemail. Okay. And then next week we'll do another one. So here we go. Here's Chuppa's part one

Chupperz: Good day, fellas. Choppers. Okay, here we go.

Someone's let Dan in on the Birdman joke right here. He's never mentioned it prior, so that's the Quadrella. Good on you. This last podcast was great. I still love what you do normally, but the different podcasts you, uh, throw in the mix always hit well. Be it the solos, the White family, or this loose action movie draft one.

I say loose because of Officer and a Fucking Gentleman. Boy, it is list one for me. Dan was doing very well. I could forgive Iron Eagle based only on the theme song by Kim Cabrera. I loved that song and the band back in the day. Still do. But inevitably, An Officer and a Gentleman killed his list for me.

I'm, uh, I'm not gonna be gobbling on Dan's wang for that list as he suggested the fuckwits would. Sloan [01:00:00] chose two, two Star Wars movies. I absolutely love them, and I know you all do Ah, but to this day they scream sci-fi at me. I can't see how, besides all of the glaringly obvious action, how it's not sci-fi.

Glaz had a very good list, but I can't give the prize to a bloke who hasn't watched Aliens. Just fucking what? No credibility at all. I would have liked to have heard a top 10 from all four of you not linked to a draft. That would have been a good ending to it. I can't think of one you left out. I now have 39 movies I must re-watch starting today, and I will over the course of this next weekend.

I have them all on VHS and DVD. Great stuff, fellas. Keep it up.

Will: What's with the soundtrack

Whitey: in the back? I know. Mate, it's like [01:01:00] he put on, um, you know, Fats Domino in the background.

Will: Oh, so good.

Dan: Oh, he's fucking good, Chappers, hey? Super insightful. Is he? Yes. Officer and a Gentleman, ob- obviously me just having a few too many wines and taking the mickey.

But, uh, mate, that would be an undertaking to watch 39 of those movies. Tell us what you think of Iron Eagle. Love that you love the soundtrack. Um, good on you, Chappers. Fucking good

Whitey: effort, mate. It's a good list. And, and, uh, part two is, is coming next week. So yeah, well done, Chappers. Well done, sir. It might even be part two and three if he's gonna return serve.

And here we go. Here's another one from a good old favorite. And it's probably a good episode to be releasing this one. Right.

Purps: Hello, my favorite fellas. A, I'm right up to date. I just listened to Forrest Gump. Will, Will the Workie, what a fucking banger. Mate, um, I've done one podcast, and I'm happy to do another one, but boys, I'm never gonna sing.

I'll come and talk, talk, [01:02:00] um, sexy to Dan. I'll talk sexy to anyone. Not singing, okay? Just so you know. Um, anywho, I'm up to date, boys. I'm up to date, and I'm back in the States. And I want to date. Oh, sorry, I was just trying to do whatever I meant. That didn't work. Okay. See ya from the 'burbs

Will: On you Purps

Dan: Oh, house the

Whitey: boys See you legend.

But Morgz has got a hard on.

Dan: Yeah. Well, it takes a bit longer than that, but I'm in the process of getting one.

Whitey: You're thinking about having a hard on.

Dan: Yeah. Now you think that sounds good. Back in the day, back in the day I would've already had a wank, but, uh, yeah, these days I'm just starting the process.

Climb the mountain if you will, Purps.

Whitey: Purps is a chef by trade. Yeah. A very good one, I must say. Yeah. I've eaten a lot of her

Dan: food. I have always loved the qualifier by trade. I don't understand it. Yeah. If you say you're a plumber, why do you have to say by trade? I'm just a [01:03:00] plumber- 'Cause it makes it-

'cause I fucking dig it. Like what? I don't get it. Stop fucking saying it, F wits.

Whitey: I, I'm, I'm gonna keep, yeah, I'm gonna keep using it. Yeah. I'm gonna

Dan: keep using it. I'm a chef by trade. I'm a chef. Fucking- I'm a chef ... shits and gigs. Yeah, I'm a chef. I'll do fine. Let's truncate that shit. Let's use better English, people.

Whitey: One of the better OnlyFans segments we've had recently. Thank you, people. Keep dropping comments- Yeah, well done ... onto Spotify. Go to our website, leave us a voicemail. Go to our website, leave us a review. Share to your friends. Come on. All right. 2026 is the year. Go to our

Will: website. Get

Whitey: yourself some- Yeah. Get some merch

merch. Be a fucking supporter. Get some merch. Do a skip top day. Um, fuck that. It's all happening.

Dan: Don't get, don't get any merch. It's fucking gay.

Whitey: Don't buy beanies. Get some merch. All right? Don't wear a fucking beanie and look like a fuckwit. Like I did a month ago. Yeah, like we'll do because he's gonna

Dan: wear one

Whitey: again.

The good-

Will: You gotta try ...

Whitey: the bad and the ugly, brought to [01:04:00] you by our mates at Gauge Roads Brew

Dan: Cafe. Ah. It's definitely hazy weather

Whitey: In it what? Well, apparently I wouldn't know, so I'm not gonna make any comment about what drinks you should have. But I'm

Dan: just gonna put you down for something

Whitey: nice. Yeah, see

Dan: if you go...

Don't, you don't wanna go to the captain.

Will: Have you actually returned the voice or, like, have you called your mate and ordered in

Dan: the cask yet? I have. I've been in contact with Mick, so, uh, the legend at Gauge Road. So we should be incoming with our winter stock. The G-man is, is looking for his hazy pale ale.

Uh, Damo wants his sidekick ale. All of the good piss. Thank you, Gauge Road.

Whitey: We love you, Gauge Road. Will? Mm. Good.

Will: Yeah. Good. What have

Whitey: you got?

Will: Soundtrack. Yeah. Fingers. Yeah. Just so good. Yeah. Uh, yeah, it's one thing that makes me excited about a, a Tarantino movie, is just going, "What's he gonna play this time?"

What music's he

Whitey: gonna do, yeah. '

Will: Cause he just always hits it out of the park. Um-

Whitey: Yep ... uh,

Will: I got a little chuckle out of the pussy kick [01:05:00] in the first fight scene in the movie. It happened within about 10 minutes of the movie starting. Yeah. I thought, "We're on here."

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: When someone throws a full boot into a front bum- Yeah

you know it's on.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: Um- Do you think it feels the same as- I had that same question in my head. I'm gonna ask Libby- It couldn't possibly ... I'm gonna go home, I'm gonna boot Libby in the I'm gonna ask her if it feels the

Whitey: same. Please don't, please don't. Ask her if in her travels she's had a foot just enter

Will: the vagina.

I'm gonna go, I'll give her one and then just go, "How's that feel? Does that feel like when I get kicked in the balls?"

Whitey: Yeah. I don't think it could, I reckon.

Will: Yeah. I thought actually on that, I've always, you know, when, um, someone gets kicked in the balls on, in a movie and all the girls are out and they all go, "Oh," and they all react as though they know what it feels like.

Yeah. How do they know?

Whitey: Well, they've just seen us carry on about it. Yeah. So, yeah. 'Cause it, it really hurts.

Will: It does. Yeah, it really

Whitey: hurts. Makes you feel sick.

Will: Yeah. I

Whitey: always feel like I'm gonna shit my pants.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: But I don't 'Cause I'm yet to shit my pants unlike Craig Plummer.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Done it [01:06:00] about nine times.

Will: Uh, the first fight scene overall, I just loved it. Yeah. Um, it was, it was a bit pulpy because she, it kicked off with the fight scene and went back to the, you know, she comes out of a coma. Yeah. So it's a little bit homage back to the-

Whitey: Yeah ...

Will: you know, chopping and changing up the plot lines. But just to come into that front, yeah, uh, like front door all of a sudden, and then bang- Bang

we're on, and we're like, "Okay, we're on a big fight here. This is good." How

Whitey: good's, how good's the Kaboom cereal?

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Did you notice that?

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Cereal that's got the gun on it, it's called Kaboom. She's not a good

Will: shot,

Whitey: though. She's a terrible shot. Horrible. She's an assassin. She must be out of practice.

Will: Reckon.

Whitey: I went to a shooting range in the States when I was over there.

Will: Yeah?

Whitey: Shot my first gun.

Will: What, that's taken you what age?

Whitey: 50.

Will: 50. To shoot a gun?

Whitey: Yeah, it's taken me 50 and a half years, nearly 51 years. Oh, wow.

Will: How'd it feel? Did it make you feel powerful?

Whitey: Uh, yeah, it made, it did make me feel a bit weird.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, what made me feel weird was the [01:07:00] complete lack of s- concern and security.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: I s- said to the guy, my son, I did it on my son's birthday, for his 20th birthday. I said to him, "Mate, we have not shot a gun before. I, I don't know what I'm doing." He said, "Oh, good, great. Let's watch this two-minute video and sign this waiver."

And then he handed over a nine millimeter fucking submachine gun with a, with, "Let me buy you some earplugs." It was in a

Dan: millimeter.

Whitey: And he went just-- And he said- "Shoot it" ... "Just in there.

Will: Just go in there." I used to, as a kid, funny story, me and my brother, Trev, we were running around the house playing Black Ops with each other behind the couch and the hallway and whatnot.

And my dad, he goes, "Oh, you wanna, you like guns?" My dad. Yes, Dad, we do. And we're like, "Yeah, we do." I kid you not, two days later, that was Monday, by Wednesday, we get home from school, he goes, "We're [01:08:00] going to the pistol club tonight. I signed us up. We're gonna go, we're gonna shoot guns."

So off we shoot- Oh, he's a legend ... off for one night. For the next year and a half every Wednesday night- Come on ... we're in the pistol club up at Mangrove Mountain, right? Shut up. Shut up. Carry on. Outstanding. Outside Mangrove Mountain, and we're the only two... I'm 12 in this club. Yeah. I'm the only... Me and Trevor are the only two kids in the entire club.

They're all, it's just old men, and they're all just like, "Oh, we've got some young blood. How good is this?" So they start laying out all of these guns on this trestle table. And you t- tell me about security. Yeah. These old dudes going, "You ever shot a gl- ever shot a Glock?" And I'm like, "I haven't shot anything, mate.

I'm 12." And they're like, "We gotta get you a license. We gotta get you a license to shoot." I'm like, "Well, let's do it." Right. So then that is how I became the kid down at Narara that could buy bullets and slugs for [01:09:00] the slug gun to shoot the bush turkeys and piss head Pete down at the

Whitey: shop. Mate, uh, it, it was- Oh

mind-blowing how easy. The guy that served me was carrying, so he had a gun on his holster. Yeah. Uh, and we went into the, into the, uh, range, and there were two sides. There were six bays on each side, and I'm in there with this big Black guy, who was a lovely fella. And we've got this nine millimeter, it's, it's called a pistol because it's not a stock, it's a, uh, support.

Will: Okay.

Whitey: That's how they can call it a pistol. Uh, it looked like something the Seals would use.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And he goes, we rock in there and he goes- That's the best gun. I've got one of them." I'm thinking, "What the fuck have you got one of these for?" Right? He then goes ... And then Luke and I looked at each other, and we open up a, a, a box of ammunition, and looked at each other [01:10:00] and said, "How the fuck do we load this?"

Right? We then ... I go, "I've seen, I've seen movies." So we're loading this thing- You know what to

Will: do with a clip ...

Whitey: I know, I know boats. I know boats. So I'm, I'm putting bullets in the clip.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And then we're trying to load the mag, and it wouldn't load. And I'm thinking, "Oh, there's some fucking wrong-"

Will: I can't believe he gave this to you and just went, "

Whitey: There

Will: you go."

Mate-

Whitey: Oh ... mate, it was unbelievable. So we're trying to get ... And I'm doing this. The guy who is next to us, who's another, um, African American guy, another lovely guy, goes, "What's wrong?" I go, "Mate, uh, this fucking magazine won't go in." He goes, "Let me have a look." So he takes it apart, looks at it. He goes, "Oh, the, the gun's dirty."

He goes, "It's, it's not you." And I go, "Oh, well, yeah, we've never, we've never done this." He goes, "You've never shot before?" He goes, "Have a shoot my gun."

He ... So he, he goes... I go, "Well, we'll shoot our gun first." Yeah. [01:11:00] So he gets our gun going, and we're shooting it, and then he goes, "You want to shoot my gun now?" He's got a 22 with a silencer on it.

Will: Wowee.

Whitey: And then he goes on to explain, "Do you watch John Wick?" I go, "Fucking love that movie, mate." He goes, "It's all right.

Come." He goes, "That's how you shoot it, like this." And he's got the gun. He's doing these ones like this is how he holds it here and does this. And then he's got his target, and he's sort of doing it under his arm like he's fucking John Wick.

Will: Mate,

Whitey: it was unbelievable. It was an unbelievable hour and a half of my life.

Will: It's fun. It is fun.

Whitey: But just the whole thing. Yeah. It was, it was the whole thing. Anyway, continue.

Will: Yeah, mental. Yeah. Anyway, I-

Whitey: America ...

Will: yeah.

Whitey: Bring it on.

Will: Yeah, it's great. What a great country. What a

Whitey: great country.

Will: We do.

Whitey: Oh, don't get me wrong. I, I, I really love America. I had so much fun there. I think it's a great place.

I think where Luke is in Missouri is very [01:12:00] quite... You're a bit sheltered by a lot of the shit that goes on. Uh, but yeah, that, that was in Missouri. That was five minutes. That, that gun range was 10 minutes from where Luke lives.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: And it was like I was in another world. It was amazing. It's great. Any, any other good-

Dan: Excellent stories both of you.

Thank you.

Whitey: Um,

Will: I actually, I've got to agree with the manga cartoon, Dan. Um- Yeah, I thought it was good ... yeah, yeah, I liked it because it was, because I, I'm looking at it with still fresh eyes. I've only seen it probably six or seven times. I haven't seen it for a very long time. Mm. So to me, the character development and everything comes second to the fact that he's just, like, throwing shit at you- Yeah

constantly, and it's just, like, he's basically taking a really gory story and then giving it a different medium to send a different kind of message to you, but including even more heightened gory, like heightened gore with the manga approach, the spraying [01:13:00] blood- Yeah ... and all that sort of stuff. Uh, I loved it.

I thought it was great.

Whitey: Yeah, I enjoy- I, I thought that he did a lot of clever things to be able to make it the way he wanted to make it.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: So the use of black and white, the use of the manga, all that kind of stuff allowed him to make the scenes that he wanted-

Will: Yeah ...

Whitey: without them being cut.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Right?

Because I think that if he obviously couldn't do a lot of the stuff and get away with it, it would be cut by the ratings board anyway. Yeah, that's right.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Love

Will: it. Um, last, uh, yeah, whatever. Uh, what have we got here? Yeah. Spanking a Japanese kid with a sword, telling him to go home. Do

Whitey: not

Will: play with

Whitey: Yakuza.

Yeah, he's such a dork.

Will: I know. It was so funny. In the middle of all that just, just mental-

Dan: Yeah ...

Will: scene, and then he's like, "Ta, ta, ta," shows him a bit of mercy. "Get home." "Get out, you idiot." "Fuck off."

Whitey: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah. Do you know what's always bugged me? The Hilltop Hoods song where they reference drinking sake with the mafia.[01:14:00]

Why the fuck didn't they just say Yakuza? Yakuza, yeah. It's the same amount of sy- syllables- Yeah ... and then it's, it's crime gang correct. Be better- Yes ... Hilltop Hoods. Why the fuck did you do that?

Whitey: It's not good. It's not

Dan: good. No.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, anything else, Will? No, that's it. Dan? Good.

Dan: Yeah, I'm gonna, I, I take a little bit of a left turn here, but you mentioned Zoe Bell.

So whilst, whilst we don't think she's much of an actress in Death Proof, um, Quentin just became completely obsessed with her during the filming of Kill Bill, and for very good reason. So if you don't know, Zoe Bell's a, a Kiwi, uh, stunt actress, and she started off as, um, Xena: Warrior Princess, which was shot in New Zealand, so she was Lucy Lawless' stunt double, and that whole show was just fight scene after fight s- after fight scene.

So you can imagine that she got a lot of training in the, uh, the extended TV series that was Xena: Warrior Princess. But when she came on set for... [01:15:00] I gotta stop.

Sorry, boys. When she came on set for- It's all them sesame seeds on top of his poke bowl. That's it. That is. My, my poke bowl's trying to kill me. Um, Quentin was just, um, just utterly amazed at what she was able to do, so much so that you mentioned the baseball slice before. So that wasn't Uma Thurman that did that, that was Zoe Bell who did the sword and the baseball slice, and she did it on the first take.

Whitey: First take, yeah. Incredible.

Dan: First take, Zo- Zoe Bell was able to do that. Um, but she, she spent months at shooting in the scene with the Crazy 88 in that yellow te- uh, tracksuit, and she had to physically tilt her head because, um, you'll notice when you revisit the scene, it's lots of wide shots, so the, it's obviously the stunt double that's doing a lot, not Uma Thurman's doing it.

But Quentin was having none of you not thinking that that was Uma Thurman in all of those fights. So she's gotta [01:16:00] do all of the incredible action whilst tilting her, her head away from the camera in every shot. And, and Quentin just thought she was incredible, and he saw the rushes every day, and he was just like, "Who the fuck is this?

She is incredible." And it basically, her, his relationship with her in, on, on Kill Bill ma- meant him write the Death Proof, uh, film basically for Zoe Bell. So I thought that was pretty incredible that a, a, uh, a, a incredible stunt actress from New Zealand captivated old Quentin so much that made him part of his cinematic universe.

So yeah, that was, the whole baseball thing I thought was just ridiculous. Um, and it was also in another one of my favorite movies, Everybody Gets Some. The, the Richard Linklater bit where the- Yeah ... the, uh, the guy, the jock does it with an axe as well, so that's pretty cool. So yeah, there's my good.

Whitey: Okay, uh-

Dan: Everybody wants some, not everybody gets some.

Get some.

Whitey: Get [01:17:00] some. Get some. Uh, QT movie starting with- But,

Will: but Robin Williams also did it in Hook. I... You guys remember that?

Dan: Yes. No, you're right. You're right.

Whitey: Was it a banging range? That's right,

Will: it was banging, doll.

Whitey: Uh, QT movie starting with our feature presentation and the

Okay. So fucking good.

Will: Yeah,

Whitey: really good. It's so fucking good. Yeah. Like, seriously. Oh, yeah. Uh, then revenge is a dish best served cold.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Old Klingon proverb, so fucking good. And it took me, it took me, I reckon it took me, uh, probably until about 10 years ago to actually know what that meant.

Will: Right.

Whitey: To get it.

To go, "Oh, right. You better believe it." Don't go revenge straight away. Leave it.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Let it settle. And

Will: then

Whitey: go back. And then go back.

Will: Yeah. I, I think there's a legitimate business out there for [01:18:00] petty revenge.

Whitey: Oh, for sure.

Will: Like, like everyone's in small business. Everyone's been stiffed by some dickhead-

Whitey: Yeah

Will: that you're like, that you're like, you, oh man, and I just, how do you anonymously get back at people? But you can do it with petty revenge. Just petty stuff. Like-

Dan: Especially in your game, there's so many shit clients in the

Will: building

Dan: trade.

Will: Oh, it's like-

Dan: Yes ...

Will: you just wanna log an advert somewhere for like pure- Yeah

bred Labrador puppies at their house. Yes. Come to mine, 6:00 o'clock- Yeah, 50 bucks ... Saturday morning.

Dan: Yeah.

Will: Yeah. They're go- they're going for $125 each. I just need them- First in, best dressed ... to get every treat wrapping up at your house for the next month. Yeah. And just do it repeatedly or something like that.

But- Yeah ... if anyone out there has a legitimate small business called Petty Revenge, write in, make a comment on YouTube or on the, uh- I like it ... Spotify page, because we need your services. Yeah,

Whitey: I like it. I

Dan: like it. Who, who was the guy that posted his ex-partner's phone number [01:19:00] up- Chewbacca ... and asked you to do a Chewbacca?

Oh my God.

Whitey: A Chewbacca

Dan: impersonation. That was gold.

Whitey: That is... Did you, did you see the ex-misses?

Dan: Oh, yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: Mate, it's, she's a thing of nightmares.

Dan: Yeah. She's

Whitey: never gonna... It was, uh, a whole- I tell you what I found. I found on Facebook I've happened across this, um, ridiculous thing. It's called Cardboard Star Wars, and it is these guys who are recreating scenes of Star Wars with suits made out of cardboard, and the ship's made out of cardboard.

And so like the, the Stormtroopers are, are made, their helmets, it's like cardboard. It's all painted like a Stormtrooper. They, then they cut to like a ship, and it's a cardboard ship with strings and, and they like, they've got... And it's, it's really funny, right? But the first time last week I saw it was the, uh, the cantina scene that Obi-Wan is talking to.

Da,

Will: da, da, da, da, da, da.

Whitey: Yep. Obi-Wan's talking to Han Solo, and I'm thinking, "I wonder what they're gonna do for Chewy." And it [01:20:00] was a Labradoodle, a brown Labradoodle with a bandolier on. And then he hops in the Millennium Falcon. He goes, "Punch it, Chewy." The dog goes woof. Like, it's so fucking funny. Like there's, there's 50 of these different clips.

Oh, man. It is really funny. It's like Cardboard Star Wars. Oh, man.

Will: Have a look for it. It's really funny.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, I think the start to this movie is really good. I think her saying, "Bill, it's your baby," and the gunshot- Oh ... and then that's the start. I think that's super powerful. And you're sort of in- Cuts her

Will: off mid--

Whitey: yep,

Will: mid-word,

Whitey: eh?

You'd mentioned the soundtrack, but like- There's Battle Without Honor, which is a . That is amazing. There's Don't Let Me Be Misunderstood, which is the Filthy Luka remix, which goes for like eight minutes. Uh, it, it, and it's great. It's so good. Uh, the, the Tarantino font-

Will: Yes ...

Whitey: I just love the f- the, the yellow Tarantino font that he uses in a lot of his movies.

We've mentioned Kaboom cereal. The death of [01:21:00] Tanaka, uh, O-Ren Ishii, uh, when he like blows up and then she gets up along the table and just slices his head off, and then the blood just, like it's just so over the top. Uh, now the showdown at the House of Blue Leaves, I believe is flawless. I think it is, it's, it's almost half the movie.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: Right? It goes for about 40 minutes, right? It is, I love it. I think there is something happening all the time, uh, and I particularly love the, the snow fight. Yeah. I think that is really good. Uh- The, like you got the black and white, so it clicks when all the 88 come in, it, it makes, she makes one cut and it clicks to, um, black and white.

So because we know if it's in color, there's too much blood, it's probably gonna get cut- Yeah ... by the imp- by the ratings board. Then it goes upstairs and it goes to the blue light. Yeah. So then there's that bit as well. So it's like he's doing all these little... I know it's very style over [01:22:00] substance, but I think he's also, I think there's reasons behind it-

Chupperz: Yeah

Whitey: so that he can keep this shit in the movie. Uh, I love the double sword, when she gets the double sword and just starts slicing the ankles and the, and the legs. I think that was really fucking good. Uh, and I put the spanking as well, I thought that was funny. Um, the, when they go outside and they're in the snow and the, and the, and the song starts and it's just the ch-ch-ch-ch, I think that is so fucking good and I've got it in my, um, I've got it in my listen to this, but O-Ren says to Beatrix, "You, you know, you won't last five minutes."

Will: "Yeah, I hope you've, uh, conserved some energy-" Yeah ... "because if you haven't, you're not gonna

Whitey: last five minutes." You're not gonna last five minutes. And the fight goes for four minutes and 59 seconds when he chops her head off, when she chops her head off. Great. And that is timed to that, right? Yeah. I think that is so good.

Yeah. And when it starts, I'm thinking, "How the fuck is this gonna go for five [01:23:00] minutes?" And then they have that bit in the middle where they sort of talk and then... And, and I love the fear in O-Ren's face when she gets cut on her leg and she knows she's gonna die. Mm. Right? I think that was great. Um-

Dan: I think she just feels she's more formidable than she had anticipated.

She thought she was gonna dust her up. Yeah. I think she changed too when she apologizes for ridiculing her. That's really nice.

Whitey: Yes. Yes. Wakata. Uh, the, the Bruce Lee, the Kato mask. So the ode to Bruce Lee with the Kato mask for- Mm ... O-Ren's offsider. Yeah. And obviously then the yellow Game of Death suit, right?

Yeah. So that's- Yeah ... that's all Game of Death. Uh, and, and for me, I, I think this is- This is his most fun film because it is set in this fantasy land.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Like I think that is, the fact that there's no character, it's one of these ones where you don't need to... Every other movie you've got to settle in.

Will: What was the, what was the previous movie that Tarantino had released before Kill Bill kicked off? Jackie

Dan: Brown.

Whitey: Jackie Brown.

Will: So it was this funk soul [01:24:00] brother- Yeah ... like blacksploitation. Dialogue-heavy- Yeah ...

Dan: Elmer Leonard

Will: adaptation. Yeah. And then immediately it was this- Mm. It was the new era. It,

Whitey: it, it was just completely different.

Will: And I just remember when it came out, every- everyone's mind was blown. It was like- But this- "Have

Dan: you seen

Whitey: this film?" This is a 25-year-old's wet dream- Yeah ... in 2003. It was. Yeah. Like this is everything that, like I think in 2003, I'm 28, this is everything that I wanted in a movie.

Will: Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. And I think anyone from the age of sort of 16 to 30-

Will: Oh, it's the best

Whitey: or 35 is probably

Will: thinking

Whitey: this is the greatest thing

Will: ever. I was giggling while I was watching it. Yeah. Just the arms coming off and blood spraying everywhere. I was just laughing. Yeah. It was just so entertaining.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: So stupid.

Whitey: Agree.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, bad. Now Dan, we're gonna go to you 'cause I feel you may have something to say here.

Dan: Yeah, look, I don't, I don't wanna... I, I'm really enjoying both of your takes on it, and I don't, I didn't, look, I didn't walk away from this going, "Oh, that was horrible." But I think what may highlight [01:25:00] my not loving it perhaps as much as you guys did, is ranking of my Tarantino films. And Whitey, we've discussed this many times.

But if I look at my Tarantino films and Tarantino written films, may not produced by Tarantino films, I go Inglourious Basterds number one, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood number two, Reservoir Dogs number three, Pulp Fiction number four, Django number five, Hateful Eight number six, Jackie Brown Number seven, and then I would have Kill Bill 1 and Kill Bill 2 as his eighth and ninth.

And then I'd actually, I'd include Tro- True Romance in there because I just love that film, and they would be ahead of, of Kill Bill 1 and 2 as well. So I think it's more of a, I, I enjoy his other films so much more-

Will: Yeah ...

Dan: than this one. And, and I think that's probably what's skewing my enjoyment of it.

Because when I think Quentin Tarantino, I think, [01:26:00] uh, people, we're looking at hitmen but what they do every day of their lives. We're looking at a, a, a Death Squad of Jewish, uh, bounty hunters chasing Nazis in Inglourious Basterds. Doing, having a, pardon me, having a revenge flick that is the same as Kill Bill, but me buying into the tension and the stakes of what's going on in that film and not really giving a shit about what's happening in Kill Bill other than the fact that, as we've said, it's super stylish and there's heaps of funky shit going on that I can appreciate the craftsmanship and the style, but not really get carried away with anything of character or, or anything beyond that, that style.

So yeah, that, that's probably what my major gripe is. Not that the movie's particularly bad, just that in his canon it just doesn't rank for me compared to his other films.

Whitey: I, I think it is, it's, it's a, it's obviously a valid point that you make. And I [01:27:00] think when you are judging someone against themselves, it's very difficult, right?

And I think also when you, when you talk about what came after the Kill Bill films- Mm-hmm ... so you've got after, after Kill Bill 2, you know, we go into, uh, obviously there's the Death Proof and, is Death Proof, but then after that- Yeah,

Dan: and look, I didn't include them because I, I have a fondness for those, but I put them in the same category as Kill Bill.

They're just complete style. Yeah. It's, uh, it's, yeah.

Whitey: Agreed. Agreed. But, but then you go, I'm with you. I think Inglourious Basterds is his masterpiece, right? Mm-hmm. And I think he thinks that's his masterpiece. Yeah. But, but that may have changed after Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. But- Yeah, and I like them both.

Dan: I, I

Whitey: think they're brilliant ... yeah. But, but when you, when you go Basterds, Django, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood It's, it's hard to c- it's hard to... And then you've got Pulp, Jackie Brown, Reservoir Dogs. This movie does not compare in [01:28:00] terms of a film, in terms of movie making and a film. This is something com- this is like, this is a f- this is a Quentin Tarantino fever dream, right?

This is nothing like anything he's done. I feel like I just wouldn't give

Dan: a shit if he didn't do these two. Like, but I'd still love all of his films. But I'd, I could- Yeah ... if I had to cut two, I'd cut them straight away. This and, and two, which I think is even, um, uh, that grabs me even less. Yeah. So that's more my gripe is, is that I love Quentin's films so much, and I just really d- this time around.

I think in the past I've been like you, Woody. I'd be like, "Ah, fuck yeah, this is super stylish. I love how he does this. Love how he does this." Whereas this time I'm just kind of like, "Eh, don't remember it like this."

Whitey: Anyway, if he hadn't, if, if he hadn't made two of his best movies in the last 10 years-

Dan: Yeah.

Recently. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Right ...

Whitey: you may, you may sort, you may have a different point of view, I think. And I think that like-

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: because I agree. A- and whereas I still think there is like, it's-- his, his movies, his latest [01:29:00] movies, apart from Hateful Eight, which is quite somber, uh, but again, it's got so many parallels to The Thing that I just am in love with that movie- Yeah

because it is The Thing, but in the Western, uh, sort of f- uh, side of it. But, you know, Django is a slave fantasy. Uh, you know, w- Bastards is a World War II fantasy. Once Upon a Time in Hollywood- Yeah, Revenge ... is, is the Hollywood fantasy. Remake, Hollywood fantasy, yeah. Like, it's, it's, he's, he's in this... Uh, th- and they are, like, incr- I think all of them are in- all these movies are incredible.

Uh, but I view this just as if I wanna check out, because I think that you need to be invested in a lot of Tarantino's movies. Yeah. You need to be really checked in. But if I just wanna check out and have a bit of fun, I think this is amazing.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: But I get when you're judging it against what he's done, that it doesn't live up to it-

Will: Mm

Whitey: as well.

Dan: Again, it feels like, and I think we all said it before, that he does, he makes movies pri- primarily for himself, and then [01:30:00] if you happen to like it, then great. This one seems to be the most where he's just gone- I think it's- "Oh, well." Yeah, here's all, all, all the movies that have influenced this. And he, he's on record saying that he stole complete plots and, uh, and, and from...

I mean, do- if we go through the movies now, like we talked about Battle Royale, that whole Gogo character is, is basically lifted straight from there. The, the entire plot of, of Kill Bill is basically a, a Westernized remake of The Lady Snowblood from 1973, which I haven't seen. But apparently he just said, "Yeah, I, I basically remade that film, but with, uh, with more genres than, uh, that was included in the original."

So when, when I think of that, I'm like, "Oh, okay, it doesn't..." I, I get it and I don't mind the fact that he's combined so, so many influences. Game of Death, obvious. We, we, we've mentioned that that plays heavily in the Crazy 88 scene. Um- The, the others like, uh, A Cruel [01:31:00] Picture, Ellie Driver's look comes from that, a 1973 pic.

Five Fingers of Death, that's where that siren sound effect comes from. Um, The Executioners from Shaolin is the whole Pai Mei, the legend of Pai Mei is, uh, essentially lifted straight from that film. So it's- Yeah ... when you, you dig a little deeper, uh, you understand he's got these influences, but he's literally...

And ripped him off is not the right term, but he's just taken what he loves from all of those films and made something new. It seems like- I'm like, "Okay, that's great," but-

Will: Don't you think, though, that Quentin Tarantino, of all the movie directors in our modern day, he seems as though he's the biggest fan of film and cinema-

Dan: Oh, undoubtedly

Will: out of all the directors. Like the blood of Tarantino. Yeah, I agree with that. Like the blood of Tarantino in Hollywood. He directs, he directs films as out of that place of him actually being a, just first and foremost, just a frother over films. A bit of a froth. Yeah.

Whitey: 100%. Th- this is his least original movie.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Like, I think that this is the one that really, like, he steals shots- [01:32:00]

Will: Yeah ...

Whitey: a lot, and like Reservoir Dogs is a, is another one where he, he has stolen quite a bit from other movies with that, and a lot of plots as well, but- It's not a

Will: tribute film ...

Whitey: but this- It's almost a tribute

Will: film to all the things that he loves.

Whitey: Yeah. But this is by far his least original film.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: It's his least... A- and to be honest, it's probably his least Quentin Tarantino film.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Like, really, like-

Dan: Well, that, that's in- The, the dialogue in this particular film is, is nothing compared to even- Nothing ... Kill Bill Volume 2, and certainly pales into insignificance versus all of his other films.

So that is what I realized after viewing this, is what I appreciate more from his films.

Will: Yes. You know- Pretty brilliant of him, though, to kick off which wa- he was probably always planning a two-parter-

Whitey: Mm ...

Will: to just, like, almost inherit a whole new audience at the right time of- Yeah ... young, like, just a younger audience that caught him with the first act of just unashamed, just like [01:33:00] balls to the wall- For sure

Whitey: action in,

Will: in a Tarantino way-

Whitey: For sure ... that

Will: made everyone a fan of it.

Whitey: Yeah.

Will: It wasn't, you know-

Whitey: I, I can't ima- but I also can't imagine that many people that Kill Bill is their favorite movie would love this. No,

Dan: that, that's an interesting

Whitey: question- No, that's- ... where, where it

Dan: ranks for everyone else, but- Yeah.

Whitey: Anyhoo- Yeah. That's my bad. Okay. Will, anything for bad? Uh, no,

Will: I don't have anything for

Whitey: bad. I, I actually don't have anything for bad either, and I, but because I actually really enjoyed it, but I do- I didn't, I, I didn't think of it in the guise of where it sits in regards to other movies.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, I, I used to think that this would rank quite high for me in Tarantino, but for me it's probably midway.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: It's probably somewhere in the midway 'cause I, I, I actually enjoyed it a lot. Now ugly, Will.

Will: Oh, look, screwing a chicken in a, in a car wash- Yeah ... is pretty ugly.

Whitey: Yeah. Yeah.

Will: It was like that and having your Achilles cut and all that in the one scene. Yeah, it's- That was like, uh- ... kind of cool ... yeah, you're [01:34:00] kinda cringing and you're disgusted all into one moment, but, you know, that's great.

I mean, that's, can't be ugly because it's exactly what he was wanting you to feel. Yep. So, um, yeah, I don't really have ugly as far as a fact of like that is shit. Yes. You know, like that's a shit part of the movie-

Whitey: Yep ...

Will: that was ill-thought out, that was just bad. No, no uglies.

Whitey: Yep. Uh, Dan, anything for ugly?

Dan: Same as Will. It was just that Vaseline case, the pubes, the dirt.

Whitey: Yeah. Well, my ugly is- That was probably the

Dan: ugliest ...

Whitey: my ugly is Buck and Vaselube.

Will: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: And what about the state of the jar? Uh, that was- Yeah ... uh, effectively-

Will: Uh, the pussy wagon was pretty ugly, but also pretty awesome at the same time.

Dan: Yeah, but, and awesome, yeah.

Whitey: Yeah.

Dan: Okay.

Whitey: Well done, gentlemen. Quick fire. Dan, take it away.

Dan: Ah, yes, gentlemen, welcome back to Quick Fire. Let's go through this rapid style. Uh, first up, lookalike, Morgsalike. [01:35:00] Anything from this slice of the Quentin Tarantino universe where you thought Morgs definitely is an absolute ringer for this guy?

Um, none that really stood out to me. Whitey, anyone that you really saw and thought, "Looks a lot like that guy. Looks a lot like me"? Anyone that, uh, that comes to mind?

Whitey: No, I, I tried to find someone. I thought, "Well-

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: are you the Japanese version of the, of the guy that Gogo stabs?" Uh-

Dan: Yeah, the salad man-

with the Achilles cut ... with all the, all the ch- he could eat his dinner through a tennis racket with all his choppers. Yes, I did think of that, but yeah.

Whitey: I, I don't think you are, but, uh, yeah, no, nothing that I could sort of- Feel comfortable

Dan: about The, the, the sycophant nature of the, uh, the, the husband that owned the, the, I can't remember the archive Charlie Brown?

Charlie Brown? Charlie Brown Yeah, Charlie Brown, yeah. De- definitely I've, uh, I've been a bit Charlie Brown in the past. But no, tough one. Don't think that, [01:36:00] uh, Quentin looked over to Cooroy, but in Queensland for inspiration on this particular movie, so thank you, Quentin.

Whitey: Definitely

Dan: not. Definitely not. Uh, five-minute movie.

What could one of the characters have done to make this a really fast movie? There's a really obvious one, Will. What do you think it might be?

Will: Uh, Daryl Hannah, just pumping that syringe straight away. That, that- Or Bill just

Dan: shooting Roy in the head ... I'm gonna give

Will: it- Well, actually, yeah, go, let's go

Dan: Bill shooting Roy in the head Yeah, I, I, you're absolutely right.

But that's right, if David Carradine wasn't thinking about going and have a auto asphyxiation wank and actually shot straight, this movie's over very quickly.

Will: I don't know if it's, I mean, it's very much like our, um, Bourne Identity episode-

Whitey: Mm ...

Will: where we go through and are you able to survive a point-blank shot to the head with a revolver?

It's,

Whitey: it's to the s- it got her on the side, though. That's the thing, right? So I tell you what, they hide that well. They hide that well under her hair.

Will: They do. That's

Whitey: a hell of a scar that suddenly just disappears.

Dan: Yeah, so considering Brandon Lee and, uh, the dude on the, the, [01:37:00] um, uh, the Baldwin set recently.

Oh, Alec Baldwin. Yeah, the Alec Baldwin set that died with blanks in the pistol, it, it seems implausible.

Whitey: Yes.

Dan: Good-o. Uh, next up, golden ticket for anything from Kill Bill that has passed over into popular culture, Whitey

Whitey: Oh, the whole m- well, okay. N- nothing that I use really, I don't think

Dan: No, we don't, we don't reference this.

No Maybe "I'm Buck, I like to fuck," but no, not really

Whitey: No. I've never said that to Megan. Um- No

Dan: But

Whitey: it's, yeah, it's not really a m- it's not really quotable, this movie. There's not a lot of... There's a lot of, I think there's a lot of good sort of, uh, lines- Yeah, there are ... but none that i- is really eminently quotable, and I think for us it needs to be quotable

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: And it's, it's really just, and we've used this word, I've got it written down here again, it's just a pastiche of pop culture

Dan: Yeah. No, nothing that really transcends

Whitey: it Will's getting wrecked

Dan: I'm [01:38:00] gonna have to start

Will: stretching now

Whitey: Will's getting wrecked

Dan: Yeah. Understood

Will: Pastiche

Dan: Uh, I totally agree with you there, uh, Captain.

That is a good call. Uh, next up, pig face lick outs for the biggest douchebag character. Now, I think in my mind we don't know enough about any of these characters for them to really be douchebaggy. No I mean, Bill doesn't have any redeeming qualities whatsoever, but we don't learn much about of him in this volume one.

Uh, Whitey, was there anyone that really transcended Bill for you in douchebaggery?

Whitey: No, I don't think... No, not really. Like Charlie Brown's wife

Dan: Yeah, she's painful, but no

Whitey: But I,

Dan: I

Whitey: don't think, I don't think there's really any... Like, like he's a douche, but is he-

Dan: We don't spend enough time with any of them to really be able to- We don't

Whitey: spend enough time with them.

There's no real good characters in this movie No

Dan: Buck's a- No

Will: I mean, he's more of an

Whitey: antihero Buck's, Buck's...

Dan: Yeah, but Buck's an outlier there. He's just, uh, horrendous, so. Okay. No, I will agree with that. Uh, Will, what about Steven Seagal running for particularly poor [01:39:00] showing of athletic prowess in Kill Bill?

Will: Uh, no, I thought that everything was fairly square when it came down to the, to the,

Dan: um, aesthetic I, I agree 100%, and I always look in action films, I'm sure you guys do, for someone who's not up to speed or, or someone that's in the background that is, uh, like in Braveheart with- Braveheart ... the, uh, yeah, the wooden swords- Carbuncle

um, putting in a p- particularly pathetic effort of being a, uh, a Scottish soldier. But no, I thought that especially all of the fight scenes within the film- I was, I was impressed

Will: when Young Love was started swinging the chain on- Yeah ... the ball and a chain. I

Dan: was like, "Hey, that's kind of weird." She was incredible.

If that... Yeah. No, it, it was front on camera, so it didn't cut away. Yeah. No, I think that was particularly impressive. So no, I agree. I didn't spot anything. Whitey, anyone that really didn't- Nup ... was... No.

Whitey: All good.

Dan: Good. Oh, totally agree. Well done everyone involved. Uh, Robot Sentries from the magnificent Aliens, which, [01:40:00] um, uh, uh, Chuppa has rightly pointed out, anyone who hasn't seen that should not have a voice on Born To Watch.

And it, as part of the Masters Cup- I'm not having that ... we learned a little bit more about their plot. Did we need to know anything more about the universe of Mr. Tarantino in this one, Will? Uh,

Will: I mean, yeah, like you mentioned earlier, it would, would've, I think there would've been enough space to cut out some fighting to do just a touch more character development.

Like why did the Viper Squad exist in the first place? What were their jobs?

Dan: What was the... Yeah, what was the, what was the gig for them? What- Who did they go and kill? Well, it, it would've taken three minutes. Did they have Bosley from Charlie's Angels? Yeah. It wouldn't have taken long. It would've taken

Whitey: three minutes.

Yeah, it would've taken three minutes.

Will: Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: And- Just

Dan: doesn't- No, one of my major bugbears

Whitey: We don't even learn about it in the second volume.

Dan: No, you learn nothing.

Whitey: You learn nothing. Have you,

Dan: have you... Yeah, it reminds me of- But you think even the stylistic flourishes, why is the bride's name beeped out?

Whitey: Yes. [01:41:00]

Will: Yeah, that-

Dan: There's no payoff for that. Who gives a fuck? Like her name's Beatrice Kiddo, so?

Will: Yeah.

Dan: What does that mean? It literally- It's really, yeah ... it's a, he sets it up and then it does absolutely nothing. It's not resolved at all in, in volume two. It, it just kind

Will: of, it just, it does remind me of like a kids' cartoon.

Like, um, or like, you know, you see these, they, they're not plot heavy. They're just, there's a bad guy or there's a team of bad guys, and all they wanna do is wreak havoc. Just be bad.

Dan: Yeah, be bad. They're just bad. That's, their motivation is we're bad. We're bad. Yeah. 100%. Yeah. Yeah. Goodo. Totally agree. Uh, last up, Whitey, if Brad Pitt, what you would wanna do to any of the female leads in this film?

Whitey, you've gotta pick one. You've got five seconds. Go.

Whitey: That's easy. It's Lucy Liu

Dan: every time. Ooh, good choice. Yeah, I can't, I can't argue that choice. They're, I mean, all, all, all are stunning. Uh- Yeah. She's beautiful ... her or, uh, Vivica A., both brilliant. 100% accept all those answers. Well done, gentlemen. That was Quick [01:42:00] Fire.

Whitey: Well done, Daniel Nice Another, another, another cracking quickfire. We, we don't have a Snod's report tonight 'cause our reporter is, uh, recovering from his RSI injury from typing. Oof. Uh, but, uh- Listen to this Wilbur.

Will: Good, isn't he? Yeah. Far out. Wouldn't it be a Tarantino movie with a, without

Whitey: a little bit of

Will: trivia?

I love that you've

Whitey: sort of graduated to now notes on the phone. Am I? You're on, you're on your little with compliment slip.

Will: I used to write-

Whitey: For the, the last, uh, Starfighter- Yeah ... you were on a with compliment slip.

Will: Yeah, I did. Yeah.

Whitey: And then you came with a little book.

Will: I did.

Whitey: And then you came with a big book.

Will: A4 spiral bound. I did, yeah.

Whitey: Now you're on your phone.

Will: I am. I like it. Yeah, yeah. I've just-

Whitey: Welcome to the future ...

Will: I've worked out how to do things-

Whitey: Yeah ...

Will: you know, smarter. In

Whitey: your own time.

Will: Yeah, smarter that way.

Whitey: It's much smarter, not gonna lie.

Will: Yeah. Uh, I mean, okay, so listen to this. When the bride sees her enemies, we zoom in on her eyes, right?

And then, [01:43:00] then we see an orange red spaghetti western flashback as the theme from Ironside that plays. Oh, right. Yeah. Da, da, da, da, da, da. This vengeance theme visual effect happens when she sees the Nida Green and O- shit, Oren, but yet it does not happen with, with the other enemies, right? The- It's

Whitey: just with the main ones.

Will: Yeah. But, um, the reason for that was is that she get, she sees some of her other enemies in, in parts and you either get the theme song but you don't get the red and y- red yet, like the, the spaghetti western flashback or whatever, but the only time you ever get the whole combination is when the enemy sees her, and so they're looking at each other- Right

and she gets, you get the whole gamut. But if she's looking at one of them and they haven't seen her yet, they don't get the whole thing. Which is quite funny. Yeah. The reason is, oh, I don't need to say it again. Anyway, um, under the influence, oh, hang on. In Kill Bill universe, once a Hanzo sword is [01:44:00] unsheathed, it must get some blood spilled on it or a curse is placed on the current owner of the sword.

Whitey: Oh. Really?

Will: Yep, yep. So, yeah. It's

Whitey: a bit Matt Raunch when he unsheathes his Hanzo sword.

Will: Oh.

Whitey: That's the curse get me all excited and things. It has to get, it has to get some flange around it, otherwise there's a curse. There's a curse

Dan: that goes on. I'm cursed. You

Whitey: got a big

Will: nose. You're cursed with a big nose.

The first feature length film directed by Quentin Tarantino to fe- feature fewer than 100 w- uses of the word fuck. And

Dan: you know

Whitey: who does use it? Ah. Doesn't use the N-word either.

Will: Yeah. Yeah. Well, I mean- I

Whitey: think it's the only Tarantino movie- Yeah ... that doesn't use that.

Will: How many Black people are in this movie?

Whitey: One.

Will: Yeah. There you go.

Whitey: Just, uh, the Nida Green.

Will: The Nida Green,

Whitey: yeah.

Will: Um, two actually, and a daughter.

Whitey: Oh, and a daughter, yeah.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Four.

Will: Um, but it is used 17 times.

Whitey: Okay.

Will: Yep. Um- [01:45:00] Oh yeah, this is a cool one. When the Bride is walking towards the stairs in the House of Blue Leaves to fight the first round of bodyguards, you see a shot taken from underneath through the glass floor, and on the soles of her shoes it reads, "Fuck you."

That's good.

Dan: I didn't pick that up, but I'll, I'll be checking that. Yeah, that's excellent.

Will: And my favorite one, on the island of Okinawa, it's widely regarded among the Japanese as the single worst place in all of Japan to get decent sushi

That's so good. So Tarantino's decision to have Hanzo operate a sushi restaurant in Okinawa was an excellent decision since it permitted Hanzo to leave his former life behind and not be bothered by those who tried to seek him out after having taken his blood oath. He didn't need to be a good sushi chef to have a restaurant in Okinawa.

Whitey: Oh, that's funny.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: That is funny.

Will: Anyway, I liked that. What about [01:46:00] you boys? Yeah, that's funny. I thought that was funny. Dan, you got anything?

Dan: Uh, just some alternative casting. So Bill was originally written for Warren Beatty, but- Yes ... uh, Warren Beatty didn't wanna leave his family to go and shoot it, but he was the one who suggested the auto asphyxiation wanker himself, David Carradine.

So that's how we ended up with David Carradine. So it was a little reverse engineering into the cane walking the earth, um, but was actually Warren Beatty that suggested. Also Bill, Bruce Willis was almost Bill before Carradine- And Kevin Costner ... got in there. Yeah. Crazy.

Whitey: And Kurt Russell. Oh, that was-

Dan: Wow

thought about

Whitey: for

Dan: a second. Yeah All of them would've worked more than David Carradine I reckon, so- Yeah.

Whitey: It's weird ...

Dan: interesting. Um, the, the script was 220 pages, which is just ridiculous. It took him six years to write, so that was why it just couldn't possibly work as a single movie. It was just way too big.

Um, and Harvey Weinstein didn't want to take the financial risk of putting something out that was gonna be [01:47:00] three or four hours long, so that's why it went into two volumes. Um, and the, uh, the two guys I really like are the, the Texas Rangers, so, um- Awesome ... Earl McGraw and his son. So they turned up as part of the Tarantino universe in several other films, including From Dusk Till Dawn, which Quentin Tarantino is one of the stars and has a writing credit in, and also Planet Terror and Death Proof, which we have- Death Proof, yeah

mentioned a couple of times. So theoretically linking all those films together and the universe together 'cause these guys are the Rangers in all of them. So yeah, there we go.

Whitey: What have we got here, son number one?

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: So The Bride was born on the set of Pulp Fiction. So Quentin Tarantino and Uma Thurman came up with the character of The Bride.

Uh, they were hanging out between takes and they were thinking about another movie they could make together. Tarantino wanted to do a '70s style kung fu flick, and Uma came up with the opening shot, b- her character being beaten up in a [01:48:00] wed- and wearing a wedding gown. So at the end- Yeah ... it says, um, the story credit reads, "Q and U," by The Bride, by Q and U.

Mm-hmm. So, uh, more during the mention, the Crazy 88 fight took eight weeks to shoot.

Will: Oh, wow. Yeah.

Whitey: Like, unbelievable. Uh- Mm. Gogo's ball and chain actually took out Tarantino. So one of the first times she did the spin, she kicked it- ... and it hit Tarantino in the face as he stood next to the camera. Excellent.

Excellent. Uh, and- Yeah, that's about it. The, the, again, the fight scene, so it goes for, uh, four minutes and 59 seconds- Yeah ... which is timed exactly that. And she said she might not be able to last five minutes, and she didn't, and she leaves without the top of her head, which is pretty cool.

Will: Yeah. How did she cut the skull off-

Whitey: It's a Hanzo sword

but

Will: not get the s- the brain?

Whitey: Well, it's, I think it did take the top of the brain off.

Will: You reckon it did? Yeah. 'Cause it looked like a bit of brain poking out the top of

Whitey: the- Yeah, there's a bit of brain. A bit of brain. Yeah. Uh, quotables, gentlemen. [01:49:00] Anyone got anything for quotables? Daniel.

Dan: Uh, yeah, I had, did have a look at this.

Stand by. Um- Looking, looking, looking. Sorry, just going through my notes. Oh, maybe I got over it. Can't find it. Sorry.

Will: Wilbur. I like this, I like the line the sheriff gave when he was walking through.

Whitey: Incredible.

Will: Looking at the, um... That was, that was like the, it was classic Harry Queen- Is that a good, is

Whitey: that good gravy?

Good gravy, Marie.

Will: Yeah, yeah. But the, um- So good. You can tell by the cleanliness of the carnage. This person was a professional. Oh, just that, that line, the cleanliness of the carnage- Right ... it, it tickled me.

Whitey: It's, it's so good. What about the, he, he says, uh, "Good gravy, Marie." "What'd I tell you, Pop? It's like a goddamn Nicaraguan death squad."

"You better shit can that blasphemy, boy, you're in a house of worship."

Will: Oh,

Whitey: so good.

Will: Um, I did like, um, "It's mercy, compassion, and [01:50:00] forgiveness I lack, not rationality."

Whitey: Yeah. It's really good. What about the other one from, uh- "Son number one?" "Yeah?" "This tall drink of cocksucker

Will: ain't dead."

That was a good one too.

Whitey: Very good. And, um, I love, I love R- Tory Hans at the end, "Revenge is never a straight line. It's a forest, and like a forest, it's easy to lose your way, to get lost, to forget where you came in."

Will: Mm.

Whitey: Yeah. I got a few, I got a few here that I quite enjoyed. Uh, the Bride, "It was not my intention to do this in front of you.

For that, I'm sorry, but you can take my word for it, your mother had it coming. When you grow up, if you still feel raw about it, I'll be waiting."

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Say that to a four-year-old kid. I

Will: know.

Whitey: I know. And obviously, O-Ren, "Silly Caucasian girl likes to play with samurai swords." Yeah. Then she gets her head sliced off.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Yeah. [01:51:00] And then I love at the end when she slices all the Crazy 88 up, "So O-Ren, any more subordinates for me to kill?"

Will: I love that line about leave your limbs, they belong

Whitey: to me. They belong to me now. Yeah. It's

Will: so good.

Dan: Oh, I didn't, in Whitey's bad bit I didn't mention Sophie as well, who's, uh, also- Yeah,

Whitey: she's

Dan: stunning

charming. Mm.

Whitey: Dreyfuss, what's her first name? Um, she's, she's, uh- Marie ... also in, um- She's also in Inglourious Basterds. Yeah. She plays-

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: you know, the one that's been pounded by, uh- She's the interpreter.

Dan: Interpreter.

Whitey: Yeah, she's the interpreter.

Will: Yeah. That's the lawyer, lawyer best

Whitey: friend of- Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah ... yeah. Sophie Fatale.

Will: Yeah. Good looking girl.

Whitey: One degree of Kurt Russell. Uh, this is quite easy. Do you want me just to go through it?

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Well, obviously QT himself, Death Proof- Yeah ... Hateful Eight, Once Upon a Time in Hollywood. Mm. Michael Madsen for Hateful Eight, and Kurt Russell almost [01:52:00] played Bill. Mm.

So-

Dan: Yeah ...

Whitey: there's a little bit there. Okay. Film school for F-Wits. F-Wits. Daniel.

Dan: Yes. Give me a second. Let me find my notes

Yes. Film score for Efwitz. Whitey, you've mentioned it many times, but, uh, as far as things that impressed me amazingly about this movie, the House of the Blue Leaves, the oner, the long tracking shot that preceding the Crazy Eight battle. Uh, it's a continuous crane shot that maps out the entire venue, and it required six hours of rehearsal and 17 takes to edu- to [01:53:00] execute.

And what's amazing about it, it was done without digital cuts. So a lot of the oners that you see in movies like Birdman come to springs to mind. It's not actually a oner. There will be some sneaky little cuts that they put in that they're using technology. But this one was all done with practical effects and using a crane shot where they had to move the camera.

And so I just wanted to have a look quickly at the technical, like technical execution and how this is done. So to start off, the shot begins on the ground level, and we're looking at the five, six, seven, eights performing on the stage. And then as the bride walks past the stage, the camera leaves her and it rises vertically up the wall to the second floor, which is, you know something cool is gonna happen when that starts.

And then when we're up on the, the upper level, it tracks an employee carrying a drink down the hallway, and then it pans down to look through a glass floor section framing Oren Ishii and her entourage walk- walking below. Then the camera moves over to follow Sophie [01:54:00] Fatale into the bathroom and holds as she answers the phone, and then tracks back out to follow her down the stairs as she joins the rest of the characters.

So the... What's really interesting about it is what it does for the spatial geography of the entire bar. So by moving through both floors and the various move- rooms in a single movement, it really establishes a clear three D layout of the venue for us. That doesn't need to be trickery. It's literally done with getting that camera going and cross-cutting without edits.

So instead of using what would be more traditional cuts to show what the different characters are doing simultaneously, the camera physically travels from the protagonist, uh, the bride to the neutral staff and then to the antagonist, linking them together in that single flow of time. And it's a real smooth, unbroken movement, and it creates more of a calm atmospheric contrast to the rapid, highly fragmenting editing style of the martial arts sequences that follow on.

So it's, I mean, it, it, I jazzed my pants when I saw it again. I know [01:55:00] Whitey would've li- liked, liked it as well. But what makes it unique and what it boils down is really three technical and structural factors. And number one, it was done completely in camera. So, um, 1917's another, another film that uses, uh, a, the artifice of a oner or, or a tracking shot throughout.

But it's very much reliant on digital stitching, which I mentioned, and it uses a whip pan or a passing object or a dark corner to hide cuts that are made in pro- uh Production. But the Kill Bill shot contains zero digital assistance and hidden cuts, and, uh, it's one continuous shot. So that's the first thing that's ama- amazing.

The-- Also number two, the interaction with the set elements. So most oners follow a single subject through a linear path. So think about, um, uh, Goodfellas, where we go into the, uh, the amazing oner where we, we see Henry Hill going into the bar to meet all of the characters in, um, in the, in the film Goodfellas.

But [01:56:00] it's-- the, the camera's on a linear path, and we're basically following through the club and heading down. But this is unique because the camera acts independently of the characters, and the-- it means the environment really reacts to it. So if you think of the glass floor, the camera doesn't just look at the people, it tracks above a glass ceiling to, to frame the actors walking underneath it.

And that requires perfect lighting synchronization so the camera's re- reflection didn't appear in the glass, which numpties like us would never have thought of but is obviously technically incredible to be able to do. And then we can think about the bathroom door and they had to get the ca- the camera inside the tiny bathroom stall with Sophie Fatale, and the entire wall of the bathroom set had to be pulled away on silent tracks by crew members the split second before the camera arrived and slid back into place as the camera moved out, which is just shit like this you, you wouldn't even think about and the reason it took so long to do.

And then finally, this has been done a few times recently with the, the TV series Adolescence, which you guys might have seen, but there was [01:57:00] the rigging of a Steadicam to a crane to achieve the vertical lift and smooth horizontal movement, and the crew utilized a really complex hybrid rig where the camera, camera operator, his name is Larry McConkey, he was wearing a full Steadicam rig while strapped into a giant remote controlled crane, and the crane would physically lift him up and he'd rig over the walls to the second floor and allow him to step off and manipulate the arm to glide down hallways and then lower him back down to the ground level seamlessly, and then he'd detach and walk through.

So it, it just incredibly complex and if you go back and watch it, you just wonder how this camera magically floats everywhere and, and the way that they did it was, uh, was pretty incredible. So I can really appreciate, uh, and I did get a man chubby about that particular scene and agree with Whitey that that whole into the Crazy 88s did, did allow a, uh, my splitsack to emit a couple of little dance.

Film school for F-wits.

Whitey: Yeah, well done. I, I [01:58:00] had a f- feeling that you'd talk about that shot in, in that segment, so you didn't let me down

Kick ass credit song now Dan is let off the hook tonight. He normally has to do the cast

Dan: I thought for sure I was gonna see my name, and I actually had a blow up when I didn't need to on our little feed- Yep ... because you were taking it on.

Whitey: Yeah, and I thought I'd do it this time. I've, I've had a couple weeks off.

I thought I'll have a crack at it. And, uh, this one's called The Bride's Not Dead.

Dan: I

Whitey: like

Will: it.

Dan: Nice observation.

Will: Yes. Yes.

Whitey: Yeah. So here we are. That's a critical part

Dan: of the movie.

Whitey: Yeah, exactly right. So it's called The Bride's Not Dead. So here we go.

Will: We, we, we're in 4-4 tonight.

Whitey: I don't know what we are, mate.

I'm just, I'm just whipping it out. Well, you're

Dan: about to hear a melody you've heard many times before.

Whitey: Yeah. Not much is gonna change from what you've heard from every other thing. Um, although when I send it to Hirschfelder, there'll be some pretty heavy notes.

Will: I mean, I [01:59:00] like that homage to Bob Dylan where you just fit a bunch more words into a verse if you

Whitey: need.

Well, get ready for it

Will: because

Whitey: here I come. His

Dan: phrasing will change from line to line. Incredible.

Whitey: That's it. Are we ready? Are, are, are you-- Has Will's done one fucking kickass credit song and he thinks he's fucking, uh, Garfunkel. I'll

Will: count you in.

Whitey: Thinks he's fucking Art Garfunkel.

Will: Counting in three.

Dan: It's a blues riff in F.

Will: Watch me for the changes and try to

Dan: keep up.

Will: I'm gonna keep with it. It's getting a

Whitey: tune. All right, here we go. Three, two, one. I'm writing my death list. One, two, three, four, five. No deadly viper sassa's getting out alive. O-Ren is first, then Vernita Green. Of course not in that order. It's QT on the screen.

It's a movie of revenge and the spec of gold. An old Klingon proverb, or so I've been told. The list is five, but we only get a couple. In volume two, we get the throuple. The bird-- the bride is knocked up and Bill [02:00:00] don't know. The viper's here to ruin the show. The whole party's dead, even the priest. Billy's most masochistic, a blood bath feast.

The bride's not dead, but she's living a life. Buck's ready to fuck, so he's in strife. Pubie Vaseline and $75. Head jammed in the door, can you hear him holler? The bride's not dead, she's raising hell. Chop off Sophie's arm so he can tell. Bill the story of the fateful night. Crazy 88 gunning a hellish fight.

Bride's not dead, but you better believe. Hattori hands her sword so he c- she can weave. The fight is over in the blood-soaked snow. O-Ren is dead and her brains on show. That's it.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: Outstanding.

Dan: There we

Whitey: go. Oh, it's

Dan: always- There's been a definite shift of writing with the Hirschfelder band in mind, for sure.

So I think that'll play very well with the house band.

Whitey: We'll see how we go. We'll see how

Dan: we go.

Whitey: Yeah. Uh, all right, gentlemen, [02:01:00] star of the show. God, that's a good question.

Will: Wilbur.

The Japanese duo in the sushi restaurant. No, I'm kidding

Whitey: Tori Hanso?

Will: Yeah. Johnny

Whitey: Boone. You say arigato like we say arigato.

Will: Well, actually, screw it. Yeah, it's those... It's that, it was that slash stick routine. Yeah. I thought that was great. Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: Very good. I loved it. It was great, yeah. Uh, Morgs, star of the show.

Dan: Uh, it can be only one guy with, uh, this particular flick, and that is the 72-year-old wanking himself to death in a tight closet- ... with a belt wrapped around his neck. David Carradine, I salute you. Ah. Not how I'd envision going out. It's, it's impressive, isn't it? Yeah. For, for dudes that go out- It, him, him

trying- ... like, "Oh,

Whitey: 6:00 a.m."

Will: Yeah. [02:02:00] Hang

Dan: on, hang on ... they're just trying to find the next plane of life. They're, they're going- Is that good? ... they're looking behind the curtain whilst trying to get the spunk sack, um, emptied. Well done, sir. Everyone...

Whitey: Wow.

Will: Everyone's just doing the odd eyebrow raise and nod.

Whitey: Yeah, everyone can take over that

Will: corner.

All right, mate.

Whitey: Stay off that cloud. Stay off that cloud. Cloud, cloud. It's Cloud 69. Don't go to Cloud 69. That's right. Yeah. Uh, I, I'm giving it to Quentin. It's, it's obviously his- Yeah ... probably most personal film, and least, uh, least original- Yeah ... but it's him having the most fun. Uh, the rank bank. Now, there, there's a few here.

I think, think there's a couple that really stand out, but, um, we can't do- We can't do, we can't

Dan: do spunk sa- we can't do spunk sacks again, unfortunately.

Whitey: No, we can't do spunk sacks again. But there's pussy wagons, there's warm sakis, there's black mambas, there's Hanzo swords, there's blood-spattered [02:03:00] angels, there's tall drinks of cocksuckers.

And that's good. But I think, I think the one we have to give it to is vaselubes. I

Will: was gonna say vaselubes, man.

Whitey: It has to be vaselubes. It... I'll tell you

Dan: what, they're both outstanding, but yes, I will, uh, I will acquiesce that, uh, vaselube is the go.

Whitey: I think it has to be vaselubes. I, I did like when I, when I heard tall drink of cocksuckers- Yeah

it went straight into the notes. And I was like, "That's a good

Dan: one." That's very

Whitey: good. That is real... That, see, that, that wins every other week. This

Will: tall drink of- Yeah ... cocksuckers ain't dead.

Whitey: Dead. It's number one.

Dan: Oh, brilliant.

Whitey: Okay. So we'll start with our guest, Will The Worky. He's not really much of a guest anymore, but we'll start with, with you, Will.

Uh, how many vaselubes are you giving Kill Bill?

Will: I liked it. I was entertained. It was as good as I remembered it, and [02:04:00] I'm a simple man. Sorry, Dan. So I'm gonna give it 4.17. Oh, B. Point seven. B, brother. Very good. Uh,

Whitey: now Dan, how many Vassalubes are you giving Kill Bill: Vol 1?

Dan: Oh, look, I, I, you guys, your enthusiasm for the film definitely swayed me from my previous position.

I'm gonna give it a 3.17- ... just because I'd like this film to stand alone in the, and I think it's a full point less than what Will enjoyed. So, yeah.

Will: Uh-

Whitey: Okay. Well, I'm, I'm gonna be the high watermark for here. I, I really enjoyed it. I, I still love it. It, I can't see me giving any Tarantino movies less than what I'm gonna give this one.

Will: Mm.

Whitey: That's how good they are.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Uh, Ja- Jackie Brown's probably the one for me that might come underneath this.

Will: Dan, I've done 18 episodes- Yeah ... [02:05:00] and I've seen a lot of shit. Yeah, you, you

Whitey: are- Will's, Will's

Will: brought a

Whitey: lot of shit. He will bring you in for

Dan: that,

Will: yeah. I've had to, I've had to wade through some shit.

You

Dan: have. Yeah. I, I do

Will: appreciate

Dan: that.

Whitey: Will's done, Will's done a Seagal.

Will: Yeah, I've done a couple. You did, you did Chuck. Yeah, I've done a Chuck. I've done, yeah. Oh, God. Okay. You've done a couple of Clint Eastwoods. Yeah, and although I- Your pay-per-views.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: It's okay. I, I'm with that. I'm giving it 4.5.

Will: Yeah, boy.

Whitey: Yeah, I really enjoyed it. I, I, it is completely style over substance. Yeah. It is. It doesn't compare as film, as a film to the other Tarantinos, but I really

Will: enjoyed it. So your, your low tide mark is 4.5-

Whitey: Yeah. I, I- ... for a

Will: Tarantino ...

Whitey: everything's above that.

Will: I'm leaving headroom because- There's- ... I'm expecting more Tarantino in my

Whitey: future.

There, there will be. There will be. But look, I'm, there's, there's possibly five 5s in Tarantino's films for me.

Will: Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: There's possibly five 5s.

Will: Yeah. Yeah. Yeah.

Whitey: Uh- I

Will: disagree.

Whitey: Okay. Now where does [02:06:00] that leave the Vassalubes? Let's find out.

Will: I reckon Dan bringing it into a 3.17 is gonna drop it down into a, a territory it probably doesn't-

Dan: Okay, it's controversial.

The, the other thing I'm thinking is that I probably won't watch that movie again. That's probably- Oh, wow. Okay ... my takeaway, mate. Yeah. I, I don't, I don't need to see it. I've, I don- I can't see a reason why I would revisit it. So there's probably a fond farewell for me as well for, for Kill Bill. Okay. Wow.

Okay. All right. I, I won't seek it out. Yeah. Thank you, Quentin, but you've got way better films that I will spend my time watching.

Whitey: With 3.95 Vassalubes- Oh, that's

Will: kind of rounded up ...

Whitey: it is- In tie with 3.95 six-fingered men-

Will: Oh ...

Whitey: the Princess Bride The Princess

Will: Bride. As you wish.

Whitey: And it is in position equal 82- Hmm

in the ranked [02:07:00] bank. Now it is- There you go ... surrounded by 3.94, Elaborate European Flat Tops Commando Commando. Commando. 3.95, um, 3.94 are Baba Yagas, which is John Wick.

Dan: Oh, Baba Yaga.

Whitey: And just below at 3.96, Seaman, The Hunt for Red October.

Will: That's funny.

Whitey: Shamer. Shamer. Yeah. Uh, gentlemen, we've

Dan: done it. The

Whitey: Scottish Russian terrorist.

Kill Bill: Vol 1 is in the rear view. I'm looking forward to seeing the whole bloody affair and seeing what Quentin does-

Dan: Yeah. Uh, sorry. I would, let me, uh, I would, I would, I would make the effort to watch the combined, but then- Yeah ... I probably won't visit. Yeah. There we go.

Whitey: Yep. Uh, so I don't know when we'll get to Kill Bill: Vol [02:08:00] 2.

Uh, it's probably a whiles away. Uh, it's not one of my favorites.

Will: When, when is the whole bloody affair showing?

Whitey: Well, it's, uh, I think it's actually out on digital this month- Okay ... which means I should be able to get it shortly. Yeah. Uh, it was released earlier in the year for a very, for like a week, or maybe late last year.

But, uh, yeah, look, when it's, when it's on, I'll, I'll let the F wits know-

Will: Mm-hmm ...

Whitey: and, uh, and we can all have a watch of it. But next week in our second part of the two-part fourth birthday celebrations, uh, we're doing what we're going to do tonight, and that is Once Upon A Time In Hollywood.

Will: Yeah.

Whitey: Which-

Will: Excellent

Whitey: was, was a movie that I had an interesting, uh, first viewing of and didn't particularly like it.

Dan: Yeah, I remember that. Yeah, that was, uh, 'cause I was frothing on it, and you were, yeah,

Whitey: decidedly

Dan: cool on it. Yeah.

Whitey: I, I, I didn't not like it. I thought I was sold a wrong bill of goods. Well, I think- That's right.

[02:09:00] Yeah ... it kind of was. It kind of was. It kind of was. I truly thought it was gonna have more to do with Manson. Yeah. Yeah. But it has fast become one of my more enjoyable viewings of Quentin Tarantino's. Yeah, same. And I think the, the back and forth between Leonardo DiCaprio and Brad Pitt is unbelievably good.

Will: Yeah, man.

Whitey: Uh, Brad Pitt finally gets his Oscar as Cliff Booth, and I'm ex- looking forward very much to the, uh, Cliff Booth movie on Netflix, which will be coming- As am I.

Dan: That will be amazing ...

Whitey: not far away. And they'll be

Dan: getting a theatrical release, so we might have to schlep-

Whitey: Yeah ...

Dan: to the Gold Coast Multiplex and, and check that out, 'cause I

Whitey: think that'll be- That'd be good.

Maybe we, maybe we, I think would be lovely to, to schlep to that and then do a, um, instant review. Would be, would be a lot of fun So,

Dan: look, you've always gotta make it about work. Can't we just go

Whitey: and have a nice fucking time? I do. We, it can be fun. We have to talk shit. You missed the, the instant review four years ago that started this thing.

I did,

Dan: [02:10:00] yeah.

Whitey: Coming to the Gold Coast. Had some shit excuse like, "I don't want to." That's it. If

Will: there's a chop- If there's a chop top involved, I'll come.

Whitey: Well, mate, we're busy, right? Yeah, yeah. It's, you know,

Will: you know,

Whitey: Morgs has done stuff for less.

Will: I have

Whitey: no

Will: doubt. Many,

Whitey: many things worse. Yeah. People, uh, please do your homework.

"Once Upon a Time in Hollywood," uh, that'll be a fun rewatch. Uh, plenty to talk about there. Uh, Hollywood, uh, probably Quentin's, probably his really most personal film. Yeah. Like this is, if, if "Kill Bill" was his, uh, I guess him being Quentin, this is probably him more in the real world.

Will: Yep.

Whitey: Uh, as much as the end scene can be in the real world, which was fucking unbelievable, to be honest.

"Once Upon a Time in Hollywood."

Will: Yeah, yeah.

Whitey: Should be a lot of fun. Uh, people, don't forget, share to your friends, and leave a message on the, uh, on the website. We'd love to hear from you. Uh, Chuppers, you're one of the best, mate. We need to bottle you and, uh, put you on my little bookshelf here with all my-

Dan: [02:11:00] Yeah, all of you other fuckheads, be more like Chuppers.

Whitey: Yeah, everyone, that, that's it. We might do a shirt that says, "Be more like Chuppers."

Dan: Be more

Whitey: like Chuppers. And, uh, and maybe have some birds on it. Yes. Yes. And, uh, yeah.

Will: There we go.

Dan: Chuppers sitting in his aviary,

Whitey: being a sick fuck. Just Chuppers, yeah, sitting in his aviary with a, with a handful of bird seed.

Will: Yeah.

Dan: Yeah.

Whitey: You know? But mate, it's been, it's been fun. Thank you, Will. Uh, you gentlemen. Thank

Will: you, matey. It's been nice to finally be able to buy my own drinks and vote.

Whitey: Yes. So, yeah. Absolutely.

Will: Yeah, it's good. Congratulations.

Whitey: Daniel, thanks for turning up. This episode- Arigatou

Dan: gozaimashita. Sayonara.

Whitey: You, you say arigatou,

Will: like

Whitey: we say arigatou.

Will: Arigatou gozaimasu.

Dan: Bye